Question about stimming

Hi, 

My 17 year old son has an autism diagnosis and I recently noticed an increase in his stimming when we go to watch football matches together. He will intermittently rock back and forth in his seat and shake his hands. 

Whilst I have no problem with the stimming itself, I realise that with him being 17 he is drawing attention to himself. I've heard that a lot of autistic adults can manage their stimming when out in public, but he told his mum that a lot of the time he's not aware that he's doing it. 

I was wondering if there are any tools or interventions he can use to reduce the stimming in public? Would something like a stress ball that he could squeeze help? 

Anyone have any experience in the area? 

Thanks in advance for your help. 

Parents
  • What is your son's opinion on his own stimming? You mention that he's not aware that he's doing it, but has he asked you to help him find a way to change or stop? Is he happy to continue on as he is? I can't help feeling that other people are the problem here, not him. But, if you are concerned for his safety—that he might attract the wrong attention—then there is probably no harm in discussing it with him and seeing if he wants to find alternative ways to self regulate. If so, redirecting his simming to something like a fidget toy (as  suggested), could be a good idea if he wants to be more discrete.

  • I think he's happy to continue as he is, as I'm sure he doesn't realise he's drawing attention to himself. But I'm just concerned that in the long-run it might have a negative impact on him. He's been home schooled since he was 13 as he has social anxiety and struggled at mainstream school. He will be starting college in September and longer term, hopefully will be able to get a job somewhere. I'm just thinking that if he can manage his stimming then it will be better for him. Yes, safety could be an issue if I'm not with him and he's alone on the bus for example. 

  • When I am in difficult environments like the bus, the supermarket and a medical appointment waiting room I sometimes wear one of the Sunflower Hidden Disabilities products - so the good people around me can realise that my different behaviour and heightened level of anxiety might welcome some awareness, understanding and support.

    This strategy e.g. Hidden Disabilities Lanyard is about managing the behaviour of other people rather than that of myself.

    Your son is already managing his stimming.

    If he chose to do so, your son could try one and see what he thinks about if it is helpful.  Some trained venues participating in the scheme offer a Sunflower lanyard for free.  For example, the customer service desk in either larger shopping centres or at larger supermarket branches (I got one from a larger Sainsbury's).

    https://hdsunflower.com/uk/insights/post/for-people-with-non-visible-disabilities

Reply
  • When I am in difficult environments like the bus, the supermarket and a medical appointment waiting room I sometimes wear one of the Sunflower Hidden Disabilities products - so the good people around me can realise that my different behaviour and heightened level of anxiety might welcome some awareness, understanding and support.

    This strategy e.g. Hidden Disabilities Lanyard is about managing the behaviour of other people rather than that of myself.

    Your son is already managing his stimming.

    If he chose to do so, your son could try one and see what he thinks about if it is helpful.  Some trained venues participating in the scheme offer a Sunflower lanyard for free.  For example, the customer service desk in either larger shopping centres or at larger supermarket branches (I got one from a larger Sainsbury's).

    https://hdsunflower.com/uk/insights/post/for-people-with-non-visible-disabilities

Children
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