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How do I stop panicking

Rach91

I constantly worry about my friend and get bad thoughts in my head of him dying in his sleep or he having another heart attack this leads to panic calls and texts. Today for example I’m seeing him for our normal Sunday together and I woke up early walked Lucy came back fed her and got everything ready I then rang him and no answer I started to panic fearing the worst panic attack then the panic calls at 10:30 I hear from him and he annoyed with me which is understandable. I forgot he was having an extra hour in bed today and I really want to stop the worrying. I’m having therapy which is a great help but it’s the trying to balance my anxiety with logic that’s the issue I’m having and my therapist is trying to work with me on that but any other advice would be appreciated thanks. 

  • in reply to Stuart333

    Catastrophic thinking, my old friend. Getting that a lot recently, I know it’s anxiety related but knowing it’s to do with anxiety doesn’t make it go away unfortunately. I think it’s worse for autistic people.

  • Perhaps try thinking of all the things, both positive and negative and write them down - then anaylse them as to their likelihood. Maybe give them a number or just likely unlikely, ridiculous etc. I find writing it down really helps. Also it redirects your energy to thinking and not worrying. You also may well have actually remembered his sleep in if you'd spent some time thinking and anaylsing the good and the bad. You can tell yourself you'll call after I have put down all the possible explanations and rated them, if it still seems likely to you that one of the bad things has happened. Make your list yours, of you like colours or post its then do it like that, physical writing or typing on your computer or phone notes. I think this uses the autistic brain to solve your own anxiety. Ask your therapist though, before doing this. I don't know you and am not a therapist. God bless

  • in reply to Iain

    I have tried that and I should try again my anxiety is better now as I’m with him now and he really does understand but being autistic himself it gets overwhelming for him. I do other things myself like yesterday on my way to the autism hub I saw a car upside down on the road driver stuck inside and the anxiety part tells me it’s my friend in that car but logic tells me it’s was to big a coincidence and I managed to listen to logic and logic was right it wasn’t my friends car same colour yes but a different make. 

  • Rach91 said:
    I’m having therapy which is a great help but it’s the trying to balance my anxiety with logic

    I found mindfulness was a technique that helped me capture that irrational fear and strip it of its power to make me anxious.

    You are basically using logic to get to the reality of the situation. Steal its power away by exposing its lies and, I find, writing it down will enable me to quickly look at the notes and refresh my opinion borne of facts so if it starts again then I can quickly quash it.

    A starting point could be to start to write down why you think these massively unlikely things could happen. Work really hard on thinking of any possibility that could ever lead to it then try to work out what the chances are of it happening versus something else you think will never happen.

    Pretty soon you start to realise there is no basis for the fears - your notes prove it. Allowing logic to be your defender can be quite effective.

    Then again they are called irrational fears for a reason - if you find this doesn't work then keep working with your therapist and see what else they have in their toolbox for this.

  • I think it is one of the cognitive distortions, catastrophising.

    I don't remember what the video said the help.