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Workplace Issues - Communication / Perception

LWS

Hello Everyone

This is my first post on here as I was looking for advice online but wanted to get your opinions on the following:

I have had my mid-year review at work were I hold a senior property position and I have dropped from 'Strong' last year to 'Developing' now.

The reasons I have been given (despite) my actual measurable performance being strong is that I need to focus on a couple of big ticket items which is fair enough. But the majority of the review centered around my communication, perception and interactions with others.

The themes were around being too direct, presentation style not always suitable for specific individuals and perception, alongside consideration for the bigger picture and other peoples ideas/views. One example being a transactional deal being 'bad' and me being too direct about it being a bad deal with those involved internally and that we should not proceed and it was fundamentally a BAD deal (which i was told about, I took the feedback onboard and never commented about that transaction again). 

I explained I am continuously working on this and it is challenging as an autistic individual who 'fixes' a few things but only to find out there is always more things to fix the next year round.

I feel that this is being held against me unfairly and does not take into account my autism. My review was very heavily centered around that with a couple of positive items only compared to the previous year.

I am actually considering going into my old shell and minimizing contact with people unless necessary purely to limit my exposure to others and their perception. Albeit, i will then be known as the outsider!

I really feel that I cannot win. My actual measurable performance way outperforms my team but what is strange is how I have dropped in rating due to those factors which are inherently part of being autistic. 

I also told HR a couple of months ago that the annual review process was not being followed correctly and was told off about this being 'rude' to not speak to my manager first. So I suspect that could also be at play? 

What are your thoughts and how would you address this situation? I actually like where I work otherwise I would have gone with the wind but have come to realize there is never greener grass anywhere :) 

Parents

  • It is a difficult one. There are some things that in the workplace we do need to overcome and manage in order for it to work but your workplace also has a duty to support your needs. I think communication, directness/rudeness is a particularly difficult one. Rudeness is subjective. What is rude to one person is perfectly plausible to another. It's something that so often autistic people are baffled by being accused of. I find performance targets surrounding something like this difficult because it's basically telling you your target is to be less autistic which is unfair. At the same time I'm aware that there are certain things that are necessary for the smooth running of a workplace and that other employees feelings count too. Without knowing you or your workplace it's difficult to truly comment on the situation. But the drop in your review is interesting because you were also autistic last year and it apparently wasn't a problem then. Did you question this? How did they respond to you mentioning autism with context to the situation?

    Personally, I think you need to speak to your manager about reasonable adjustments. In a previous workplace I managed misunderstandings that were happened by having a plan of going to my line manager first before I addressed anybody about an issue. This way she could help me decide whether it was something that needed raising. If it was a lot of the time she raised on my behalf. Other times she'd coach me through what to say. If there was any misunderstanding/backlash I then had the fall back that I was following my line managers instructions. I wonder whether this would be something that would be useful to you? This way you don't have to mask or retreat into your shell. Just know that you'd have someone to help you navigate it so you don't get it "wrong".

Reply

  • It is a difficult one. There are some things that in the workplace we do need to overcome and manage in order for it to work but your workplace also has a duty to support your needs. I think communication, directness/rudeness is a particularly difficult one. Rudeness is subjective. What is rude to one person is perfectly plausible to another. It's something that so often autistic people are baffled by being accused of. I find performance targets surrounding something like this difficult because it's basically telling you your target is to be less autistic which is unfair. At the same time I'm aware that there are certain things that are necessary for the smooth running of a workplace and that other employees feelings count too. Without knowing you or your workplace it's difficult to truly comment on the situation. But the drop in your review is interesting because you were also autistic last year and it apparently wasn't a problem then. Did you question this? How did they respond to you mentioning autism with context to the situation?

    Personally, I think you need to speak to your manager about reasonable adjustments. In a previous workplace I managed misunderstandings that were happened by having a plan of going to my line manager first before I addressed anybody about an issue. This way she could help me decide whether it was something that needed raising. If it was a lot of the time she raised on my behalf. Other times she'd coach me through what to say. If there was any misunderstanding/backlash I then had the fall back that I was following my line managers instructions. I wonder whether this would be something that would be useful to you? This way you don't have to mask or retreat into your shell. Just know that you'd have someone to help you navigate it so you don't get it "wrong".

Children
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