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How do you know what you want?

Stuart333

I mentioned this to my psychotherapist and the consultant that did the assessment. I did not get an answer, but I don't think this is normal:

Especially when tired, I can get a bit emotional if I think of certain things. I'll then think I really want something. But I'll wake up in the morning and feel nothing and not care. Alcohol causes issues the next afternoon, causing more emotions.

I asked someone at work. I think normally when you calm down or wake up the next day you still have the emotions, but toned down. So you still know you are interested. It's like I have a threshold things have to reach to be noticeable. By which time they are ramped up quite high. 

Without consistent emotions I find it hard to know what to do. This also confuses other people 

I looked at an emotion wheel, and I think I know what all the things round the outside feels like, so I must have felt them at some time. Unless I iintellectualised it, but I don't think so.

I did the TAS-20 alexithymia quiz and got 66, which is interesting.  According to Wikipedia 50-85% of autistic people have alexithymia, compared to 10% of the general population.

Parents
  • Stuart333 said:
    Without consistent emotions I find it hard to know what to do

    Alcohol acts to lower your natural inhbitions and can enable the emotions to be more accessible, but it also acts as a depressant which will often put a negative perspectiive on this, plus it can also reduce your ability to control impulses so you can act on the feelings without thinking things through properly.

    It would be wise to avoid stimulants and depressants while working on your emotions I think, so greatly reduce alcohol, caffaine, sugars, nicotine etc

    Your psychotherapist should be able to help you with building the connections with your emotions using the tools like the emotions wheel and others to build your confidence in what you are feeling.

    It can be a frustrating and challenging process, especially if you don't like change but I found it made me a lot more self confident and feeling a more complete person as a result of doing so.

Reply
  • Stuart333 said:
    Without consistent emotions I find it hard to know what to do

    Alcohol acts to lower your natural inhbitions and can enable the emotions to be more accessible, but it also acts as a depressant which will often put a negative perspectiive on this, plus it can also reduce your ability to control impulses so you can act on the feelings without thinking things through properly.

    It would be wise to avoid stimulants and depressants while working on your emotions I think, so greatly reduce alcohol, caffaine, sugars, nicotine etc

    Your psychotherapist should be able to help you with building the connections with your emotions using the tools like the emotions wheel and others to build your confidence in what you are feeling.

    It can be a frustrating and challenging process, especially if you don't like change but I found it made me a lot more self confident and feeling a more complete person as a result of doing so.

Children
  • in reply to Iain

    I don't have any nicotine, no sugary drinks, snacks or foods, I don't have sugar in tea, minimal caffeine, and alcohol is not excessive. I only mentioned it as it is interesting the main effect is after it has left my system.

    I don't feel that much most of the time, just neutral. That's why I said it's like there is a filter and the setting is too high.

    My issue is almost like which one is the real me. The normal flat one, or the tired emotional one. Tiredness does not always do it. 

    Is the tiredness lowering the filter so I feel the real me, i.e.i can't intellectualise and mask stuff, or is it creating stuff that is not real. Or is it a trauma or some other response, or some manifestation of alexithymia, or some kind of schizophrenia. I 

    In most of the therapy sessions I intellectualised everything and showed almost no emotion. I wanted to but I couldn't. They were always in the morning and the feelings come later in the day. It's strange. Same in the assessment meetings. One of the questions when I first sought a psychologist was why are my emotions battened down so tight.

    I don't know the answer. I'm not sure how to tell.

    I just wondered if anyone else felt anything similar, even if not it might be interesting.

    This is partly why I am drifting. It could all be hormonal too, we'll see what the blood tests show. Nervous system disregulation affects your endocrine system..