Has anyone found that as they’ve gotten older some or most of their traits become more apparent. I’ve spent a little time using Dr Google and there’s plenty saying this increase of traits isn’t due to ageing but due to increased pressures in life which would make sense. My mask started to crumble and fall apart when my mum passed away, I shutdown internally and swallowed the emotions till my nan passed away and I think was the straw that broke the autistics back, life was now completely out of my control and so were my emotions. Life experiences build up over time and create a clearer picture of one’s own identity, wants and needs and also opinions on existence. I’ve always pictured myself as a bottle that was once full but is slowly leaking with every hit life swings as it, each hit slowly draining my internal reserves and causing irreversible damage to the bottle itself. I find myself wanting to spend less and less time around others that I don’t need to, I get a lot more drained from unwanted company than I ever used to. I’m 37 and feel 97 grandad slippers already equipped, just missing the pipe and a Charles Dickens book.
