What I don't want

You know what you don't want, but from that maybe it's possible to extrapolate what you DO want?

I'll have a go....

You want to live somewhere different.

You want to stay childless but don't want to be lonely

You want people to treat you well and not take advantage of you.

So how can you achieve that? Here are some ideas -

Look for a new home in a different area. I know that's easier said than done, but focus on that goal and remind yourself that it could help you put the past behind you. Be proactive in looking at homes on the internet, apply to the local housing register if you're eligible, look for jobs with accommodation included, whatever it takes to get to live where you will be happier.

There are other people who also don't want to have children. If you want to do online dating, make sure this is clear on your profile so you don't get into a relationship where you'll have pressure to start a family. See if there is a local meet up group for autistic people, or try joining a local club or evening class that aligns with your interests. This could lead to new friendships and possibly eventually a partner.

Don't continue relationships where people try to exploit you - whether family, friends or romantic relationships. You have value and should be treated with respect. There are good people out there.

I hope you gain a sense of community and connection by chatting with us, and find this forum useful.

You put it all better than I could.  I looked into online dating but it's all fakeness and I don't have confidence in my appearance either.

You put it all better than I could.  I looked into online dating but it's all fakeness and I don't have confidence in my appearance either.