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Can’t relax

Elfilis

I am just so unable to relax at the moment. Over the years I’ve been in situations that have really irritated me and have played on my mind since. But as time has gone on it’s like I’m now just feeling so overwhelmed and overloaded with irritation, anger, stress, you name it. Like at one point I can be triggered by actual stimuli and then another point I can just been triggered by my own mind remembering things I don’t want to remember. Im also finding like I can be triggered by my mind and then whilst I’m upset I get triggered by proper stimuli and then it just builds up and I’m not able to get a break. I keep remembering one time when I kept hearing noises I find so irritating and aggravating and it was my dad making those horrible noises and I kept getting irritated, kept stimming and all he said was, well I don’t want to say as it’s really a huge and upsetting and annoying trigger for me, but the thing is he wouldn’t do anything about it apart from laugh at me. He knew what he was doing and kept doing it and crossing my boundaries. I’ve had other situations with other family members have crossed my boundaries when I’ve stated what is a trigger to me and they just don’t care, they say oh just chill or something when I simply cant. I know I have only just had my autism diagnosis recently but even so, I’m upset I got shunned off and to “get over it” when to me it’s really easier said than done. 

I’m trying all sorts of things to relax me but my mind is so foggy with nasty things I’m unable to focus, relax etc. can anyone relate in some way? Is there any advice at all? 

Parents

  • The first thing that comes to my mind is thought-stopping. I don’t know what your thoughts on therapy or if you are currently in therapy, but it sounds like learning more about thought-stopping might be helpful. The idea is basically whenever you have a negative thought, chase it with a positive or neutral thought.

    For example, earlier this year I kept having the recurring intrusive thought of something to the effect of “I can’t keep going,” but I would chase that thought with “But I can try.” Eventually the intrusive phrase left my mind, but it took a good week of thought-stopping to get rid of it.

  • in reply to profdanger

    When I have thoughts swirling around in my head (which is most of the time), I find it really hard to stop those thoughts, clear my mind, concentrate, start a task, etc. Since "coming out" to myself about being Autistic, I've started letting my hands do whatever they want to do. I've found that lifting my right hand up, palm towards me, fingers spread and then waving it in front of my eyes seems to stop my brain dead for a few seconds. It's a kind of magic! It gives me a brief moment where I get a chance to switch track. I might have to repeat it several times, but I find it helps. Give it a go and see if it works for you.

    Does anyone else have any thought-stopping stims?

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  • in reply to profdanger

    When I have thoughts swirling around in my head (which is most of the time), I find it really hard to stop those thoughts, clear my mind, concentrate, start a task, etc. Since "coming out" to myself about being Autistic, I've started letting my hands do whatever they want to do. I've found that lifting my right hand up, palm towards me, fingers spread and then waving it in front of my eyes seems to stop my brain dead for a few seconds. It's a kind of magic! It gives me a brief moment where I get a chance to switch track. I might have to repeat it several times, but I find it helps. Give it a go and see if it works for you.

    Does anyone else have any thought-stopping stims?

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