Long story short I’ve been bullied growing up but now I feel I have got to a point where I am unable to think for myself. For example I’m unable to have an opinion because I’m told what I think isn’t right and genuine. Also suffering with extreme guilt and shame with what I like as I was told I think I like what I like but I actually don't apparently. Now it’s like a voice in my head is nagging me all the time and I just feel so rubbish about myself and it’s leading to burnouts. When it comes to things I like, etc gaming, I keep thinking I’m not meant to enjoy them because if I’m happy then I’m weaker and also if the characters were real they would freak out seeing me and hate me. I’ve deprived myself from things that I thought made me happy and I feel rubbish and weaker. I question myself do I really like what I think I like? Tried various therapies but they don’t seem to be working and worried I’m just gonna get worse as time goes on and feel it’s too late to get better mentally.
Hope this makes sense
Has anyone been able to relate? If so is there any advice?
