Work Disclosure

Hello everyone,

 I work as a quality manager, I have a small team of 3 staff, I find this difficult but I thought I was managing them, but recently one of them has been making lots of mistakes and refuses to do the work I give her. So I had a 1 to 1 meeting to chat about it. She over reacted and started to shout at me and dominate the conversation. I became very anxious and could barely continue the meeting, as I was shutting down. 

I was told by HR this morning that she has made a grievance against me. Even though I’m shocked and worried I have been told not to be. That everything will be okay. But the HR manager suggested that one of the outcomes might be that I should inform my team that I am autistic. So far, only the management team know and tend to ignore it which means I am still heavily masking at work. I think it might lead to more problems, as I already have what has been described as ‘a difficult team’. Also non of them have English as a first language so they might not understand the implications.

Previously my therapist suggested that maybe I should tell everyone at work, as it would help prevent misunderstandings from all sides. I would prefer not to have a team and for them to report to another manager, they seem to listen to and like the operations manager because he flatters them.

Does anyone have any advice? Have you been in a similar situation? 

Parents
  • Thanks both. I had the meeting with HR today. The grievance seems to be, as you noted, from someone who doesn’t like to be criticised but would happily continue underperforming.

    HR think it’s a communication issue ( as usual an autistic person having communication issues) between me and the member of my team who isn’t English and so there is a language barrier. Even though she seems to understand other things very well. 
    I think HR will push for me to disclose, I asked if I do and it makes matters worse than what will you do? I was told I would then be able to bring a bullying complaint against her.

     I’m waiting now for HR to respond to my meeting but it could take until next week.

Reply
  • Thanks both. I had the meeting with HR today. The grievance seems to be, as you noted, from someone who doesn’t like to be criticised but would happily continue underperforming.

    HR think it’s a communication issue ( as usual an autistic person having communication issues) between me and the member of my team who isn’t English and so there is a language barrier. Even though she seems to understand other things very well. 
    I think HR will push for me to disclose, I asked if I do and it makes matters worse than what will you do? I was told I would then be able to bring a bullying complaint against her.

     I’m waiting now for HR to respond to my meeting but it could take until next week.

Children
  • I was told I would then be able to bring a bullying complaint against her.

    Okay that’s pretty key. I was afraid when I first read your post that opening up to your team would potentially make you vulnerable to bullying, especially by the problematic coworker. But if your HR is prepared to step up to the plate for you if things go poorly, then it’s safer to do it.

    I’m glad you asked what their response would be.