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I have no friends , and I think other autistics find me to much or don't like me, or get offended by me.

Spacecollision200

Guess what I'm looking for is some sorta validation, i have been kicked out of a the only support group meet ups and I im feeling lonely, im starting to wonder why if even autstics find me off putting I've noticed this because I have multiple other issues like bpd aswell , and if have both autstim and bpd diagnosed, i put myself out there but no one gets back to me.

People even autstic people probably think im even to blunt for them , and i don't mean to hurt people, that's why I'm autstic like im bad at social stuff and offending others or them misinterpreting things, but i feel like most autstic people don't get kicked out of groups and they all get along mostly and they have some base level of harmony, they are all different but fit the mold essentially I've seen but i feel like a freak even with other high functioning autstics i know many people don't like this term , i just don't know how best to describe it , I feel like today its hard not to offend people and with me being autstic its becoming increasingly difficult anxiety to know the right wrong thing to say and it feels like even other autstics think im bad and won't let me back in group.

I guess what I'm trying to ask is has anyone had a similar experience i feel so alone like my experience is odd not normal.

My experience.

*offended other autstics a high majority agaisnt you

*getting kicked out support groups

*people not wanting to be your friend (I don't paticularly think im nessarly a horrible person)

*alone isolated feeling like a freak amoung autstics myself.

* I im capable of forming a flowing conversation and been in threapy for 1year and have a successful reltionship with healthy communication which has took a while , but I'm capable of maintaining friendship and seeing a others point of view , and understanding or at least I try my best if I can't relate to situation.

Thank you for anybody who responds , I know its a long shot to know if someone has been through somthing similar here but I really feel like a true odd one.

Parents

  • Did you ask why you were kicked out of support groups?

    Make sure you have facts, not what you think, just in case your perception is wrong. What did they actually say or what was the real reason. Are you sure you just didn't withdraw because you thought they didn't like you.

    Was it more than one group?

    Beware of cognitive distortions.

    Watch this to see what they are. youtu.be/Ek6V4F6nWM8

  • in reply to Stuart333

    I'll read into this but honestly ill tell truth , I was saying none traditional views but I ment no offence i just wanted to find someone with the same views as me cause I felt isolated, then someone had a go at me he called me a "intolerable swearword beginning with A" hope i don't get banned writing that now.

    then I got upset tried to send screenshot the chat to send my partner of this person calling me a "intolerable A , asked my partner if I was doing somthing wrong then accidentally sent it to the group chat instead , so awkward, then i felt self conscious cause people saw it the screenshot I took, then i called myself the bad word, because I got upset because the other person attacked me for my views and called me names and swore at me even though I wasn't hurting them or anything I remained rational until the name calling started to hurt my feelings.

    I asked to join back 5months after that event and they said we think not, over email.

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  • in reply to Stuart333

    I'll read into this but honestly ill tell truth , I was saying none traditional views but I ment no offence i just wanted to find someone with the same views as me cause I felt isolated, then someone had a go at me he called me a "intolerable swearword beginning with A" hope i don't get banned writing that now.

    then I got upset tried to send screenshot the chat to send my partner of this person calling me a "intolerable A , asked my partner if I was doing somthing wrong then accidentally sent it to the group chat instead , so awkward, then i felt self conscious cause people saw it the screenshot I took, then i called myself the bad word, because I got upset because the other person attacked me for my views and called me names and swore at me even though I wasn't hurting them or anything I remained rational until the name calling started to hurt my feelings.

    I asked to join back 5months after that event and they said we think not, over email.

Children
  • in reply to Stuart333

    Thank you for replying though you helped :)

  • in reply to Stuart333

    It was the main meetup group for my area , what's app group for my area like 100 autstics are in group and meet up is every week not all 100 go though.

    So i kinda pooped on my own doorstep if that makes sense cause that was the only popular autstic meetup in my town.

  • in reply to Spacecollision200

    It was only one person. But by not ignoring them you escalated it. The internet is tricky because people feel compelled to respond. It is best to ignore insults.

    It is also wise to be careful with your wording if you want to post something people may be offended by. 

    It might be best to save contentious stuff until you have established a presence or reputation, or start off with small items to judge the reaction. It depends on how non-traditional the views are. If you want to post things which might cause arguments then you need to keep things factual and be able to back it up.

    Perhaps your views are mistaken, you need to be open to people pushing back.

    It was also only one forum. Not much you can do now, except just move on and find another, unless you can get other people to vouch for you.

    My original point still stands though. Be careful about thinking the worst, black and white thinking and assuming what all other people think.