• Replies 9 replies
  • Subscribers 85 subscribers
  • Views 667 views
  • Users 0 members are here
Options
Related
Hints and tips
  • To quote someone's message, first select/highlight the relevant text, and then use the Quote button that appears
  • To "mention" someone, type @ followed by the start of the forum name, and choose from the list; that person will get a notification of being mentioned

Recommendations for coaching for business events

Nexus-7

I'm 47F and was diagnosed this year with autism and ADHD. I'm Managing Director of a small business and also Chair of Trustees of a small charity. In both these roles I am frequently required to go to events which involve socialising - such as conferences, networking events, meetings, etc. Also sometimes I am asked to speak - but I avoid this if at all possible. 

I have social phobia, and in my personal life I am extremely anti-social. But in my work life I have to attend these events. I find it excruciating and leading up to any event I have terrible anxiety and dread. Afterwards I play back and dissect every interaction thinking of all the things I said and did wrong, or how I could have been misinterpreted.

I'm super awkward, so even things like someone goes to hug me, or even worse the dreaded air kiss, I always seem to go to the wrong side and cause the interaction to be weird. One time I even went the wrong way for a kiss/hug, then laughed out of awkwardness, and as I was laughing they went in for an air kiss and my teeth hit their cheek. Other times I have accidentally said the wrong thing and offended people. I cringe when I think about these things even from years and years ago. I also experience brain freeze due to anxiety. 

I used to think maybe I was being paranoid but since my diagnosis I realise I'm not. This has made the issues even worse as I have lost all confidence. 

So, my question is do any of you have recommendations for coaching to help with this? I live in London but I'm open to doing it online also. 

Thank you! Grateful for this community. 

Parents

  • Good morning, I don’t have much in the way of advice but I can say you’re not alone. I work as an employment specialist who assists people with disabilities find jobs, but a part of my job is to go to chamber of commerce events to meet potential employers. This means I have to put on my best show to impress bankers, small business owners, radio personalities, etc. I struggle so hard with socializing and would much rather be a wallflower at these events.

    For me, what helps is knowing that others are relying on me to do my best (although, you could argue that puts more pressure on me as well). Also, thankfully because I help people with disabilities if things go sour socially I can disclose that I, too, have a disability like my clients, so I have that ace up my sleeve. I know neither of those points probably help much for your situation, but that’s how I deal.

    I hope you can find ways to feel more comfortable in those situations. Wishing you the best!

  • in reply to profdanger

    Thank you, I really appreciate your reply. It’s good to know I’m not alone! All the best to you as well. It sounds like you are doing great and meaningful work. 

Reply Children
No Data