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Seeking Insight and Support – Possibly Autistic, Struggling with Longstanding Challenges

Barney

Hi everyone,

I'm 34 and have been living with long-standing challenges related to depression and social anxiety. These have significantly impacted my life and well-being. Over the years, I’ve taken lots steps to try and improve things but I still find myself unhappy, confused, and exhausted. 

Recently, a colleague suggested that I might be Autistic. I hadn’t considered it before, but after taking a few online tests that gave a strong likelihood I might, I’ve started to look into it more deeply. Now I’m beginning to recognise some patterns. For example, a close friend recently came to visit, and I had a hard time managing managing my behaviour and emotions. In the past, I would have chalked it up to depression and/or anxiety. But now, I can see elements of Masking, Burnout, and Shutdowns. 

Essentially, I want to learn more so I can understand myself better, identify if I am autistic, how I can seek help and find a way better forward.

If anyone has any advice, insight, resources to recommend ect, I would be really grateful. 

Thanks for reading, 

Parents

  • If by "identify If you're autistic" you mean raise your credence that you meet most of the ASD diagnosis criteria, then I'd be curious as to whether you know the cause as to why you have that goal.

    Being formally diagnosed did not change my life in any way. Everything is still the same undesirable mess.

  • in reply to purelambdaphi

    Knowing you have a broken leg does not fix your leg.

    Being diagnosed for ASD does not fix you or automatically make things different. It is just knowledge.

    It may allow you to access some support if you obviously need it, but mostly it is for you.

    What you do with the information is up to you.

    You may stop being so hard on yourself, you may start to pay more attention to what things are causing stress, you may try change stuff to avoid burnout or depression, you may realise you have problems and seek help,. But you still need to push yourself a bit. As an adult no one is going to do stuff for you. People can help but you need to take the first step.

    It can also inform therapists who may then be able to help more and not just make things worse.

    So a diagnosis can change everything and nothing, it is up to you.

Reply
  • in reply to purelambdaphi

    Knowing you have a broken leg does not fix your leg.

    Being diagnosed for ASD does not fix you or automatically make things different. It is just knowledge.

    It may allow you to access some support if you obviously need it, but mostly it is for you.

    What you do with the information is up to you.

    You may stop being so hard on yourself, you may start to pay more attention to what things are causing stress, you may try change stuff to avoid burnout or depression, you may realise you have problems and seek help,. But you still need to push yourself a bit. As an adult no one is going to do stuff for you. People can help but you need to take the first step.

    It can also inform therapists who may then be able to help more and not just make things worse.

    So a diagnosis can change everything and nothing, it is up to you.

Children
  • in reply to Stuart333

    Is the idea here that you speculate what causes Barney's goal in getting "identified as autistic" is: a) a belief that there is some relevant analogy between a broken leg and a neurodivergence, b) it probably opens up avenue for "support" (I never know what people mean by that word in the context of ASD), c) emotional comfort, d) therapists will spend last time asking questions during a session (?)?

    (Well, I frame it as a speculation, but you might be thinking of it as an induction of some kind.)