I saw something on YouTube from Mom on the spectrum a couple of days ago saying going to bed was hard as it represents a transition. I hadn't thought of it in those terms.
It struck home as I have wondered why I spend hours sitting in my chair thinking I ought to go bed and not doing it.
Do others do this?
I find it hard switching off, not going to bed. The difficult part is transitioning in the morning as I sleep quite deeeply.Getting up is not a problem waking up can take a few hours.
You have to set a reminder/alarm an hour before you go to bed. Then turn off everyhing and leave your phone outside the bedroom.
Look up CBT i. Its CBT for sleep
Yep, I hate going to bed and end up wandering here and there or just standing staring.
I think I also heard that talk.
This is where I find my procrastination for the transition interesting because I like to read, particularly before I go to sleep. But I often find I've procrastinated about going to bed for so long, I'm exhausted by the time I do and too tired to concentrate on a book. The brain is an interesting thing. Procrastinating even when you want to do something.
This happens to me too.
I didn't know it was connected to autism, I thought it was just because I couldn't be bothered to move, but more than that, it's hard to explain.
I feel better knowing this.!!
Thank you(•‿•)
I have wondered why I spend hours sitting in my chair thinking I ought to go bed and not doing it.
I find that having something worth going to bed for can make a lot of difference.
I keep some particularly nostalgic books in my bedside table and after I've showered, brushed teeth etc I like to snuggle down and escape a bit to some favourite childhood memories.
In the colder days I use an electric blanket (no central heating where I live) so I have a snug bed to slip into - delicious.
I've seen me going to bed at 7pm some days just for this.
Yes I procrastinate ridiculous amounts about going to bed and I think it's absolutely because it's a transition.
Can’t say I have this issue exactly but I do find it hard sometimes to get that starting momentum to put my phone down and start the process of going to bed but once I’m in bed I don’t have any issues with falling asleep (with help from medication). I know some wait till they are almost passing out before going to bed and thats their norm but to me that’s not normal, I always get into bed, close my eyes and lay quietly with my own thoughts till I become unconscious.
This is amazing - thanks for sharing the link.
We do. We always mean to go to bed earlier but hardly ever manage it. It’s often 2am before we manage to actually go to bed - it’s mad. I think for me it’s the having to clean my teeth - so I keep putting it off and then before I know it it’s 2am, or I fall asleep on the sofa. When I actually get into bed I love it - but I hate getting ready for bed. I feel like such a failure that I can’t change this bad habit!
Are you going to bed at a time when you feel tired, or is it an artificial time? I mean one that makes it possible to get up for work/school/college/getting everyone else out of the door? My natural pattern is to go to sleep about 2am and wake at about 11am, I've been told I "should" go to bed earlier so as I get up at a "proper time", who would I be doing this for, because it certainly wouldn't be me. I've done my time of having to get up for school, work, children etc, so why does there have to be a "bed time"?
Thank you for posting the links Bunny. You are very disciplined.
I’m going to try some of the tips in the Dr Neff resource. I just can’t seem to wind down at night. It feels as if bed time is taking me away from other things I would rather be doing and I can’t seem to be disciplined about sticking to a healthy sleep routine. In bed I toss and turn for ages before falling asleep.
Someone once told me, “stop saying you will try (to get to bed), don’t try, just do it”.
I used to struggle with this, and would often end up falling asleep in the living room before waking in the early hours - feeling discombobulated - and finally dragging myself to bed.
After my autism diagnosis, I made an effort to improve my sleep hygiene, including by starting to follow a healthy sleep routine. This is now firmly established, and includes going to bed at the same time every night (significantly earlier than before), and then reading in bed for a short time before going to sleep. Whilst it felt rather odd to begin with, it's become a very natural process.
You might find these resources helpful - they include advice about improving our sleep hygiene and routine:
Neurodivergent Insights - Autism, ADHD, and Sleep - by Dr Megan Anna Neff
And this book (by the same author), which covers sleep along with many other things:
Self-Care for Autistic People: 100+ Ways to Recharge, De-Stress, and Unmask!
No, I have never had that problem. However, I think that the transition for me is covered by reading in bed, which I always do. It helps in the move from being active towards sleep. As a child, if I had an especially good book to read, I did sometimes read right through the night, which was problematic for school the next day.
Hmmm, I consider 11 an early night. I have not slept well for over 30 years, I get 5-6 hrs a night on average. I seem to be able to function on it.
I used to go to bed around 1-2am, if I didn't need to work the next day then sometimes 4am. Once I start reading or doing something I don't want to stop.
I liked night as it is peaceful and free of distractions.
I also wondered if it was a control thing.
The last 4 months I have been trying to stop it and go to bed earlier, but now I get up between 4:30 and 5:30.
Maybe I do avoid going to sleep. I stay up late till around 11-11:30pm because that is the time when the rest of my family are in bed and I'm completely alone, it's my time to do whatever I want without compromise or judgement. And I suppose I do put off going to bed because I get distracted. If I don't finish something I want to do though that will just keep me awake, bed or not. This has it's drawbacks though, as I'm getting older I have to have at least one earlier bedtime a week to reset, or I'll get extremely tired the next day.
I don't, bed is one of my safer places, no one else really comes into my room and thats how I like it. I lie there and have a good think, then I read my book, then I go to sleep usually before the book falls on my face
