Noise

Hello. I'm 31, still living at home, and I have really bad anxiety but lately this past year I feel it's getting worse, especially with noise. Around the corner of our house is a park where children go to play and hang out obviously, but they have to pass by us to get to it and sometimes they stop on the corner of our house. If I hear them It makes me so anxious, my heart beats faster, I feel sick, I can't relax. I would look out of the window wondering what they're doing, why are they standing outside our house, I couldn't relax until I seen them walking away. And that would be the same with anyone who parked outside our house as well. 

So I started wearing my headphones around the house, playing music at full volume to block out any sound, but sometimes it hurts my ears. So I bought ear defenders but with them I could still hear noise, and didn't find them helpful. Then I bought another pair of ear defenders that are reliable hearing protection against high noise levels in Industrial Settings, 37 dB. But I can still hear the noise from the outside world, my anxiety is heightened, I get frustrated and can't relax. Also my Mum Is getting frustrated as well, when she tries talking to me, I say I can't hear you but won't take my headphones off. I only take them off late at night because I know there's no noise coming from outside. 

So my question is, is there any headphones that can cancel out all noise from the outside world? Or any advice on dealing with this, would be much appreciated 

Parents
  • Thank you all for your comments, I appreciate everyone's advice. It's nice to know that I'm not the only one that feels this way.  to answer your question about how the situation makes me anxious is, I can hear their footsteps when they run pass the house to the park, or some children have a football and I can hear them bouncing that on the way round or it will get kicked against our wall, as they go past. Or they stop on the corner by our house talking, maybe deciding what to do or where to go next, I don't know. I just don't get why they have to stop outside our house. Why don't they stand by other houses or just go straight to the park. The Doctor advised us as the headphones aren't working, the other option was to move house which at present is not possible.  I can hear them from any room in our house as we live in a bungalow, but I spend most of my time in my room as it's the furthest away from the noise, but will still wear my headphones.   my doctor said the same as you, that the music is not good for my ears and they will get damaged over time. But at this moment I would rather have loud music in my ears than hearing outside noise. I will be taking your advice and looking for noise cancelling headphones, I'll just have to do some research to find the right ones. Also thank you  for the links, they are useful.

  • I fear the only real answer to why kids do what they do is because they're kids, I doubt very much if there's any malice or even forethought in it. I do get how annoying it is and how unhelpful peoples responses are, nobody seems to understand the hell that very good hearing can be, I'm the only person in the house who can hear a lamp buzzing and the airfryer, people look at me like I'm mad when I say I can hear them, the only person who does believe me is the electrician!

    What I was trying to ask is, is it the noise alone that stresses you or does the noise then trigger things like imagining what might happen or be happening?

  • The noise makes my anxiety worse, then I stress over what they are doing or what is going to happen. So I'd say the noise triggers my anxiety, then imagining what worse case scenarios might happen.

  • It's fine, I don't mind you asking these questions. So around the corner of our house is the wall of our house, then our back garden gate and another little wall then our garage. In 2022 our back garden gate got kicked in by a group of children playing football, my mum heard a bang, and she went outside to see what happened, the children came into our garden and got their ball back, then ran off. My mum reported it and it was noted, it was early morning and I was asleep at the time, I didn't hear any of this. Also my mum's retired now but earlier this year or maybe even last year I can't remember, I was waiting for her to come home and a child was walking outside the front of our house then sat down right outside our driveway, talking on their phone and eating sweets. I just get so anxious and stressed, why do they have to be outside our house, that's why I wear the headphones, I play my music loud and don't think about who's outside, I won't look out of the Windows either as if I see someone that triggers me. I should also say theirs two schools in the area a primary and secondary, so I know that at certain times I'll have my headphones on especially early morning when they go to school and when they leave school. Or we'll be out for the day and come back later in the evening when it's slightly quieter. School times I don't mind cause even if I'm outside in the garden, I can relax a bit, I can still hear them, but I know they're not by my house. I am currently on a waiting list for a counsellor but that can take up to 5-6 weeks until they see me.

Reply
  • It's fine, I don't mind you asking these questions. So around the corner of our house is the wall of our house, then our back garden gate and another little wall then our garage. In 2022 our back garden gate got kicked in by a group of children playing football, my mum heard a bang, and she went outside to see what happened, the children came into our garden and got their ball back, then ran off. My mum reported it and it was noted, it was early morning and I was asleep at the time, I didn't hear any of this. Also my mum's retired now but earlier this year or maybe even last year I can't remember, I was waiting for her to come home and a child was walking outside the front of our house then sat down right outside our driveway, talking on their phone and eating sweets. I just get so anxious and stressed, why do they have to be outside our house, that's why I wear the headphones, I play my music loud and don't think about who's outside, I won't look out of the Windows either as if I see someone that triggers me. I should also say theirs two schools in the area a primary and secondary, so I know that at certain times I'll have my headphones on especially early morning when they go to school and when they leave school. Or we'll be out for the day and come back later in the evening when it's slightly quieter. School times I don't mind cause even if I'm outside in the garden, I can relax a bit, I can still hear them, but I know they're not by my house. I am currently on a waiting list for a counsellor but that can take up to 5-6 weeks until they see me.

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