My friend N has written this excellent poem in response to the ill-informed media comments made by Nigel Farage MP for Clacton & leader of Reform UK in relation to SEND diagnoses.
You can find the story about his comments here https://www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/politics/farage-send-children-autism-reform-b2738961.html
In respect of forum Rule 2: No personal information and identifiable content
I will not publish N's name or further details despite the fact I've been given permission to do so. That said N is eminently qualified to judge with the background & skillset at their disposal
'MORE THAN A LABEL'
You call it a label,
like it’s stitched on for show,
You claim it’s handed out freely
by a GP through video.
But try telling that
to the parents who wait
- three years, maybe five -
while the school shuts its gates.
It’s not just a label,
it’s a key to a door
that too often stays locked
while their child’s on the floor,
Too anxious for mornings,
too shattered by noon,
fleeing the classroom
or hiding in their bedroom.
At school, they say,
"She’s fine while she’s here,”
but they don’t see the fallout,
the shutdowns, the fear.
The shoes that won’t go on,
the sobs in the night,
the meltdowns at dinner
when nothing feels right.
They don’t see the child
curled tight in her mum’s bed,
or the drawings of monsters
that live in their head.
They don’t hear the question:
“Mum, what’s wrong with me?”
or the whisper of “please,
can I not just be me?"
Parents are pleading
not for a crutch or excuse,
but for school to stop
tightening the noose!
To see what they see,
to believe what they know:
that their child is in pain
with nowhere to go.
They sit in cold meetings
with nods and blank stares,
ticking off boxes
while no one seems to care.
“They’re doing just fine,”
comes the confident line,
as if masking at school
means they must just be lying.
But masking’s a wound
that deepens with time.
At home is where the truth can be seen,
where once-brave little faces crumble in agony.
As schools give out lectures:
“The world won’t be kind,
They need to be tougher,
To strengthen their mind.”
But rights aren’t indulgence
they’re a scaffold, a brace,
so they CAN hold a job,
so they CAN find their place.
Reasonable adjustments –
not pity, not gifts
Without them, they’ll flounder:
No, it isn’t a myth!
Diagnosis unlocks
what blind eyes ignore:
the path to potential,
to dignity, more.
It’s not just a label
it’s access, it’s care,
it’s the difference between
a lifeline - and a lifetime of despair.
It's the rights that protect them
from those who won't play fair
And that’s not to mention
the alternative labels
the ones they’ll carry alone:
Not "autistic"—but lazy,
arrogant, a loner.
"Disruptive". "Naughty".
"Unloveable". "Weird".
Not knowing the truth,
just the things that they feared.
"Why can’t I focus?"
"Why do I cry?"
They grow up believing
they’re broken inside.
Diagnosis is light
where the dark used to be,
a name not of shame,
but of validity.
It says: "you are worthy,
you’re wired this way:
not bad, not wrong,
so please don’t hide away!"
Don’t talk of the “overdiagnosed”
when most get denied,
when they're punished and pathologised
for the way they survive.
Don’t claim it's too easy,
or done in a day.
Let the children be seen.
Let the parents be heard.
Let need be acknowledged
not silenced, deferred.
A diagnosis is not
a medal or brand:
it’s a pathway to support,
a stretched out hand.
So, Farage, take a seat
and hear what you’ve missed.
SEND children are people -
Their experiences shouldn't be dismissed.
