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How do I help a work colleague - if I even can?

mrs.snooks

Hi. The first thing to say is ... I am not 'out' as autistic, at work.

A colleague at work has just had his job replaced by AI and is now on a 1 month trial in a new role. He is also not 'out'. But everyone can see that he is autistic. (They probably think the same thing about me, but may still think I am just rude.) He also does not know that I am also autistic.

He has 1 month to show that he can manage this new role and I fear that the odds are stacked against him. The organisation is not really very tolerant.

He is like me. And shows all the problems of executive function issues. He had his first day of learning the new job yesterday and I could see him struggling.

So my question is, how can I help him keep his job. Would really appreciate your advice. And if it is you who I am talking about, reach out to me. I'm hidden, but here.

Mrs Snooks

Parents

  • Excuse my ignorance here, but you can't help someone who may not wish to be helped.   

    He may be 'out' in some sectors of his life, or not at all, but you can't expose him at work, nor show a helpful sign of solidarity.   Besides, he may be exhibiting signs of something else (not Autism) and you may just see common traits.   

    What can you do?   Accidentally drop some kind of identifier on the floor near him to ensure he sees it, to make sure he realises he has an ally, should he need one?   Might work.    An 'I am Autistic card' possibly.  I dunno.    It sounds intrusive, but he may, if you're right, reach out.    Would you have someone reach out to you like this?  

    More subtle.   See him do something and say...  "I struggle with that because I am Autistic", and see if it draws him out??  

    I'm not criticising, I'm just thinking through.  I'd probably wish to help if I were you.  In fact, I'd likely reach out (and maybe make it worse)  

    I mean - you could make a friend here, best case scenario. 

Reply

  • Excuse my ignorance here, but you can't help someone who may not wish to be helped.   

    He may be 'out' in some sectors of his life, or not at all, but you can't expose him at work, nor show a helpful sign of solidarity.   Besides, he may be exhibiting signs of something else (not Autism) and you may just see common traits.   

    What can you do?   Accidentally drop some kind of identifier on the floor near him to ensure he sees it, to make sure he realises he has an ally, should he need one?   Might work.    An 'I am Autistic card' possibly.  I dunno.    It sounds intrusive, but he may, if you're right, reach out.    Would you have someone reach out to you like this?  

    More subtle.   See him do something and say...  "I struggle with that because I am Autistic", and see if it draws him out??  

    I'm not criticising, I'm just thinking through.  I'd probably wish to help if I were you.  In fact, I'd likely reach out (and maybe make it worse)  

    I mean - you could make a friend here, best case scenario. 

Children
  • in reply to overwhelmed & underwhelmed ( O & U )

    Thank you so much for the advice. I am totally with you on all points. Thanks for replying. Not sure what I am going to do. Just feel quite powerless. And absolutely, don't want to make things worse. Really appreciate what you have said. x