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Preference to chat with one or two people

Lotus

I prefer to chat with just one or two people - more than that and it doesn't feel so comfortable. In a group, communication feels more forced and less natural to me. Is this because there are too many people to focus on and the conversation becomes more "random"?

Does anyone have any knowledge or ideas about this?

Parents

  • Same with me. With one other person it is clear to me who talks when, with two close friends I can manage. One situation with 3 of my friends I can do, but that is because we're playing a board game at the same time so we're focused, plus we're all quite civil waiting for others to finish talking.

    Gatherings though, like at work or family, that is where the struggle is. Usually there is more than one conversation happening at the same time, so then I can't decide which one I should focus on, meaning I'll try to hear both (impossible). Or, if I focus on just one then I'll be distracted by the noise of the other one.

    What I noticed recently was that I try to follow the rules as they appear on a TV show of film, you'll notice that dialogue between characters always flows well because it's meant to drive the story. Even on a wartorn battlefield, somehow the characters can have a perfectly well heard and well flowing conversation. But real life isn't like that at all, it's messy, noisy and people talk over each other all the time.

  • in reply to pdaddio83

    I used to try following what you observe on tv too - as you say, doesn’t work in real life. Think that’s why I used to watch so many soaps when I was a teenager - everyone assumed it’s because I liked that kind of trashy telly (which I don’t have a problem with), but I’ve now realised decades later that I was watching it to try and learn about people and interaction. Led to lots of social errors in my teens and early 20s

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  • in reply to pdaddio83

    I used to try following what you observe on tv too - as you say, doesn’t work in real life. Think that’s why I used to watch so many soaps when I was a teenager - everyone assumed it’s because I liked that kind of trashy telly (which I don’t have a problem with), but I’ve now realised decades later that I was watching it to try and learn about people and interaction. Led to lots of social errors in my teens and early 20s

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