Mute / block function

So much drama! I thought us autistics were above such things. 

A is a good person, as you say. I'd be sad if they felt they had to leave.   

Perhaps, one day. Atm, I'm insanely busy preparing an exhibition, working, and parenting. But I'll keep it in mind certainly

JT said:

I think it's going to take one of us setting up a platform or network ourself?

Arise has made a thread about this:

 Build a better forum 

JT, are you volunteering?

Capt Grover, you can't turn your back on this place for a minute without missing something! Storms in teacups, people falling out, people falling in, others spaffing statements inappropriately over threads that have nothing to do with the spaff.

And then good people like A feel they have to leave because it all gets to chaotic and stupid.

Oh I know  I believe it's called 'legend mode' 

Oh, jeez. I've been 'away from my desk' for a bit. What's going on A? Why are people fed up with you? 

I was being dead cold stone sober and straight.......but with absolutely no malice or ill-intent implied in your direction.  I have no problem with jest.....nor semi-sincerity.....I just am......Number.

Love it. Was being semi sincere with just a hint of gest

That's very sweet/sarcastic of you JT, but with all the sincere and blunt autistic honesty that I can muster.......F**K THAT.

I think it's going to take one of us setting up a platform or network ourself?

I am part of a large group of artists within Might Networks. It's great.

Might Networks is a platform specifically for custom community building.

Might be a good start? Number, I think you'd be an amazing leader

Ameratin.  I wholeheartedly hear you.  You make valid and rational points about the reality of being here.  Your length of presence here lends weight to your opinion and perceptions (in my estimation!)  What ever happened to the fun mate?!

If it were to be the sad truth that "this isn't a forum for people like me".......then I am really at a loss to understand who his forum is meant for....because it certainly isn't feeling like a forum for "me" either now......nor evidently the plethora of other long standing and valued contributors that seem to have melted away in the last few months....nor the endless "through-flow" of others.

Your feelings on the current state of play here, resonate strongly with mine, albeit from a different perspective......and we both know that this is common to our mutual experience....we know our differences.....but our commonality always wins out.  If you fly away, it will be a loss.

Who knows what tomorrow brings.  If you are gone, I will miss you and I wish for you only better, happier and more fulfilling things than can currently be found here.  

Assuredly yours

Number.

I haven’t watched Harry Potter either. I read about 5% of the first book several years after publication but I just couldn’t get into it. At times I too have felt this isn’t the right place for me as some of the posts seem to be littered with nuances that I don’t understand. Like many autistic people, nuanced language is not intuitive for me and sometimes I wonder how many autistic people feel unable to respond and feel excluded. I agonise over some of my replies and posts, and I keep checking the rules. Over the short time I’ve been on this forum, it seems to me that some posts and or threads break the rules, but they weren’t moderated or marked as such, but others were, and this confuses me. I hate breaking rules and I am frightened of getting moderated and marked or deleted. I think debates are important but I am yet to decide if this forum is the best place for them. Perhaps we need a separate area or section allowing an “agreeing to disagree agreeably” section, as in “The Rest is Politics” (Rory Stewart & Alastair Campbell Podcast”)? We could be careful not to allow any rude name calling of particular politicians (which is something Alastair & Rory definitely haven’t managed) or of contributors, otherwise we could be open and blunt about the things going on in the world that matter to us. 

I’m glad that you are telling us how things are for you and I hope you can believe that clearly I and others value your input, whether we may or may not agree with you. I have been on this forum  since only last month but can see that it isn’t perfect. I am finding it hard to keep track of multiple threads on a single post and I haven’t always noticed easily if someone has replied to my comments and at times, may have missed replying or replied in the wrong place. I can’t see any way of triggering a notification just for responses to my comments and not to other responses. Perhaps I am not understanding how the forum works. I too would like a mute function. There are people on this forum who are on their own (I’m divorced but alone by choice now), and for us it can be difficult not to have someone to bounce ideas off or to have a good rant, especially in the evenings. I too would miss you if you leave, but you must do what is best for you.

I wil miss you if you leave, but I understand why you feel the need to step back and I totally share your feelings about some posters and wishing not to see them, I agree with OVerwhelmed, that it's long past time we had such a function.

I feel like I don't belong here a lot too, I mean I must be the only person here who's never read or watched Harry Potter! I feel like such an outlier here, so few of my interests interest others and I often feel othered by the tumbleweed drifting across thread I've tried to start. I wonder if we need a room or forum for those of us who are a bit older and maybe have had many years of living undiagnosed? I really notice the difference between us latelings and older people and the younger ones who've know since childhood, I think we should mix as we can all learn from each other, but it would be nice to have a place to be old and grumpy.

I actually think there is room for debates here, otherwise it will like a newspaper problem page and we may as well just have FAQ's rather than real interactions.

I wish you well. I missed all the hoo-hah, so I don't know what it was about.

One thing I can say with absolute certainty is everyone here thinks that they don't fit in here. If I had a penny for every time someone said that, I'd have about £1.55.

So, don't leave because of that. Too many people are leaving.

It’s about more than just that thread Pixiefox. I’m just not like the rest of you.

I’m sorry for upsetting you.

Dear A

I know we had a difference of opinion the other day and it upset me a bit too, but I want to apologise if I triggered you - it was not my intention.

If you decide to stay, I will not reply to your posts any more so that I do not trigger you - but please be assured that I'm not being nasty or unkind, I'm trying to make things easier for you.

If you leave. I wish you well.

I think that in the end, no matter what we think this forum should or shouldn't be (ie it's function), how we feel others should interact with us, what we think should and shouldn't be discussed, how we think the functionality should be and how we would prefer the lives of others who use the forum to be (ie connections) - 'it is what it is'.

I've come to accept that and I do personally try to avoid disagreements nowadays although I don't have hope that I will always be successful.

I think it's the best we've got, especially for us in the 'Latelings Club'.  (I think I have Mr T to thank for that expression).

So, to use an analogy I used in another thread, we are each of us a differently shaped piece of a jigsaw which when all fitted together makes the image of the forum.

If it makes us sad/depressed/ anxious then we should have a break or leave, but there's always the opportunity to return.

You are absolutely correct to request such a function.  This is 2025, and the world, you'd think, has moved on from basic forums such as this. 

In any other form of social media & interaction, you can choose whom you converse with, and whom sees your posts.   Why should a place like this be any different?

ASD people are known to have views that can sometimes make them slightly more combative, or indeed not want to communicate using social graces that others employ.  The scope for conflict using argument & bluntness of speech is greater. 

There may well be some here who don't mind combative people jumping in here & there, and nor do I sometimes - but on certain days, and with certain subjects, when it touches a nerve, I - and presumably others - don't like it.  That's the purpose of having a block or mute facility.  

ASD is a serious matter.  This isn't the banter chat-box, nor a debating society when it comes down to it.  

Just my opinion, and it is based on years of seeing similar in other forums too. 

Thanks Mr T. I should clarify the “triggered” statement.

Actual arguments are unusual but there are a very small number of posters here who frustrate me intensely and it would be helpful for my sanity to just not see them.

Also, as a life long singleton (not by choice) I had hoped an autism forum would include more people like me but there are just endless posts about partners and children and that just makes me feel even worse about myself.