Not autistic diagnosis part 2

Thanks everyone for your words in my first post. I didn't  reply before because I wanted to have my job sort out and read the full report before say anything.

Workwise, they are going to remove my accommodations gradually, and even congratulated me for that because  " It's great that you're  not autistic and that open doors for you here!" I know, great...

About the report... I was so ready to say that doctors know more than me and that I understand that the line have to be in someplace and if I don't  make the cut means that I don't  have as much challenges than others (or as much as I think). But then I read the report. They mention like 3 times that I have superior studies and a career and that I have been able to do it in a language that it is not my first language. They also mention that I have long lasting friends (2 same  friends my whole life) my long lasting relationship, and that I "demostrate empathy in particular for my family and those in need". So, I guess that is what disqualified me? I don't get it, an autistic person cannot  have superior studies? Cannot have a small group of friends? (Don't  they think that if I only have 2 friends and they are the same since I was 5, maybe is because it is fxx hard make friends and those 2, as weird as myself,  just  have been there always, so they stay?). Cannot have a long term relationship? (Even though he is probably autistic/asperger)

They don't  say why I am not autistic, just that I don't  meet the criteria, but they added "demonstrate similarities to autistic  characteristics within  recriprocal social interaction and restricted, repetitive, and stereotyped  pattern of behaviour ".

So... that's  it, am I autistic? To be honest I don't  know, but at this point I am too tired to even trying for a second opinion. So, I guess I am taking this as  that I am not autistic, and my sensory issues are just some kind of quirk, my rigidity is that I am a control freak and my lack of social skills is the language/cultural barrier

Sorry for the rant and thank you to everyone that have take the time to read this.

Parents
  • I’m sorry you had such a frustrating experience. It is probably very hard to deal with the thought of self-identifying after somebody told you, you’re not autistic for such weird and diffuse reasons, but maybe you could try thinking of it as “displaying autistic traits”. I for my part don’t know if I’m autistic but I definitely know that I display a broad variety of autistic traits and recognising that has helped me to accept certain things and to cope with my day to day life a bit better. I think that it is very unfair to remove accommodations at work. You got them without having a formal diagnosis so why remove them now? It doesn’t really matter if you are autistic or not. If someone struggles with sound, why not let them use noise-cancelling headphones. If someone regulates through self-stimulating behaviour why not let them use fidget toys. If someone needs their information in a different format to really understand, why not help them with their processing. Of course, I don’t know what accommodations we’re talking about, but still… 

    I hope you’ll some day be able to cope with those traits. Be it through seeking a second opinion, self-identifying or whatever works for you.

Reply
  • I’m sorry you had such a frustrating experience. It is probably very hard to deal with the thought of self-identifying after somebody told you, you’re not autistic for such weird and diffuse reasons, but maybe you could try thinking of it as “displaying autistic traits”. I for my part don’t know if I’m autistic but I definitely know that I display a broad variety of autistic traits and recognising that has helped me to accept certain things and to cope with my day to day life a bit better. I think that it is very unfair to remove accommodations at work. You got them without having a formal diagnosis so why remove them now? It doesn’t really matter if you are autistic or not. If someone struggles with sound, why not let them use noise-cancelling headphones. If someone regulates through self-stimulating behaviour why not let them use fidget toys. If someone needs their information in a different format to really understand, why not help them with their processing. Of course, I don’t know what accommodations we’re talking about, but still… 

    I hope you’ll some day be able to cope with those traits. Be it through seeking a second opinion, self-identifying or whatever works for you.

Children
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