What confirmed your own autism suspicions?

Hello, I am very new to all this, so please forgive any faux-pa's I make regarding post-etiquette. 

I am awaiting autism  diagnosis on the NHS. I have read up extensively on the classic signs, but I am curious what specifically confirmed it for you.¹ I have made many analogies to people over the years, as I have struggled to find a cause for what I believe is behind my decades-long battle with anxiety and depression. I am 52 years old

It is like you are walking around in a big spacesuit. You can perform basic tasks but are unable to interact with people on an intimate level. They see you, but are unaware you are in this suit. It's frustrating, as you can see people living their lives, while you can only watch. 

This is the best description of how I feel and it is a desperately lonely place to be. I often contemplate the point of it all when It seems an impossible problem to conquer in an ever increasingly complicated world.

Apologies for the ramble, but it would be nice to know I'm not alone.

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  • the age. I'm also new here. the age becouse I can't explain anymore why I'm so.. strange? (I'm not an english speaker). But I read here - everybody want to chage. I don't want something will change, not in my life. I will be happy that all the others will change. I feel bad not becouse of me, it's always about what I know that people think about me. and, I don't have fear, I'm not sad, ... maybe its not ASD? I read and almost anything its "me". all the major things. can someone be weird but normal?

  •    greetings. Thank you for your correct words. I am who I am. I cannot change my nature. But we live in a world that I do not understand. Being human is about connecting with other humans. If I cannot do this on my own terms, I need to make a kind of 'safe mode', bare bones  version of myself that is capable of connecting although it is just on a superficial level, it is better than nothing. Be safe

  • of course. I notice that I can be great when it's the first time. after that people start asking, becouse it's the way to know someone. than I have no good answers. I lie or become weird. it's like a human ruler. people will think you're great - if other people will think so. If someone pay you big salary they will think you worth it. if you have a lot of friends they won't think I'm werid they will think "he make fun". I don't want to play in a game that I can't win it. but I must say I don't sure if it's asd.

  • where i from I forgot to answer, if there is a privte chat I can say. I don't want here but I'll be happy to tell in privte.

  • hi. I did all the web tests, got high score but web test.. if you try for example to do HDAD test, or another, I think they will show almost same result. if you had never heard about autistizm but you know about bpd for example. you'll read people talking about it. you'll find somthing that will fit, than you'll look at the rest of parts and you will tell yourself maybe more than one thing is fit. becouse the reason you start to read or do web tests is you not feel like others. 

    the line meet people from other cultures - I think it's in some web tests! I never understood what the meaning. travel or talk.

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  • hi. I did all the web tests, got high score but web test.. if you try for example to do HDAD test, or another, I think they will show almost same result. if you had never heard about autistizm but you know about bpd for example. you'll read people talking about it. you'll find somthing that will fit, than you'll look at the rest of parts and you will tell yourself maybe more than one thing is fit. becouse the reason you start to read or do web tests is you not feel like others. 

    the line meet people from other cultures - I think it's in some web tests! I never understood what the meaning. travel or talk.

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