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What confirmed your own autism suspicions?

Violetfred

Hello, I am very new to all this, so please forgive any faux-pa's I make regarding post-etiquette. 

I am awaiting autism  diagnosis on the NHS. I have read up extensively on the classic signs, but I am curious what specifically confirmed it for you.¹ I have made many analogies to people over the years, as I have struggled to find a cause for what I believe is behind my decades-long battle with anxiety and depression. I am 52 years old

It is like you are walking around in a big spacesuit. You can perform basic tasks but are unable to interact with people on an intimate level. They see you, but are unaware you are in this suit. It's frustrating, as you can see people living their lives, while you can only watch. 

This is the best description of how I feel and it is a desperately lonely place to be. I often contemplate the point of it all when It seems an impossible problem to conquer in an ever increasingly complicated world.

Apologies for the ramble, but it would be nice to know I'm not alone.

Parents

  • Hello and welcome to the community!

    For me, accepting that I’m autistic has been a bit of journey, and I’ve struggled a lot with imposter syndrome. Before my diagnosis, I took so many online tests multiple times, and every single one consistently came out well above the thresholds. Even after being diagnosed, I found it hard to believe I had been properly assessed and often questioned if I’d been misdiagnosed, despite the fact that the assessment itself was very thorough and lasted several hours (as well as the person assessing me was incredibly qualified). I look back now and feel a little stupid for doubting it.

    What I’ve come to realise is that much of my imposter syndrome stems from years of being told that my “issues” and struggles to fit in were due to mental health problems. But the treatments and medications never worked, leaving me feeling like I was just broken and unfixable.

    What has really helped me accept my diagnosis is spending time around other autistic people and feeling a genuine connection with them. Learning from others on this forum and watching videos from autistic creators on YouTube has also been a huge source of validation and understanding for me.

    I probably wouldn’t have ever asked for an autism assessment if it wasn’t for a very good mental health nurse who suggested I could be autistic. I’m grateful to her for making the referral and proud of myself for going along to the assessment even though I was massively doubting it. I live a much happier life knowing I am autistic and being part of the community.

Reply

  • Hello and welcome to the community!

    For me, accepting that I’m autistic has been a bit of journey, and I’ve struggled a lot with imposter syndrome. Before my diagnosis, I took so many online tests multiple times, and every single one consistently came out well above the thresholds. Even after being diagnosed, I found it hard to believe I had been properly assessed and often questioned if I’d been misdiagnosed, despite the fact that the assessment itself was very thorough and lasted several hours (as well as the person assessing me was incredibly qualified). I look back now and feel a little stupid for doubting it.

    What I’ve come to realise is that much of my imposter syndrome stems from years of being told that my “issues” and struggles to fit in were due to mental health problems. But the treatments and medications never worked, leaving me feeling like I was just broken and unfixable.

    What has really helped me accept my diagnosis is spending time around other autistic people and feeling a genuine connection with them. Learning from others on this forum and watching videos from autistic creators on YouTube has also been a huge source of validation and understanding for me.

    I probably wouldn’t have ever asked for an autism assessment if it wasn’t for a very good mental health nurse who suggested I could be autistic. I’m grateful to her for making the referral and proud of myself for going along to the assessment even though I was massively doubting it. I live a much happier life knowing I am autistic and being part of the community.

Children
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