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Am I being too sensitive?

Allie🖤

Family has gathered for the Holidays and I’m already feeling uncomfortable as the only autistic person involved.

The conversation somehow leads to autism, my sister and her boyfriend begin talking about how someone had told them that they both have “autistic traits”. (Personally, I feel that they’re both very neurotypical.) They joke and sneer as is they’ve been insulted, as if being autistic is the worst thing you can be called. Right in front of me. 

Both of them are fully aware that I have a diagnosis, yet they don’t see a problem with what they’re saying. My parents then continue to say “they didn’t mean it to upset you”… but it did upset me, it upset me a lot. 

I feel belittled and like my feelings don’t matter. I feel like I should just shut up and deal with it. I feel so upset and I don’t want to be around anyone. Am I being over dramatic? Am I being stupid? 

Parents

  • No, you are not being too sensitive or stupid.

    What they did proves they have a lower emotional intelligence.

    As they are both the same way they most likely make a good fit, but everyone else around them suffers because of their insensitivity and stupidity. This time you were the victim of it. Next time someone else maybe. 

    The others telling you they did not mean it are acting either as "family rescuers" (taking the punches to keep the family together, so you basically have one half that enjoy the rid, the sacrifices the others are making), are afraid of conflicts, confrontational or are just as ignorant. 

    You must have felt even more alone, unsupported when actually the rest minimize what happened, confusing you, your feelings, the whole experience of it. Could be they missed all the signs of how it was said and the joke and sneer, but then again they were not the victim here or then paying enough attention. This weakened you more when you should have had emotional support.  

    But you know, a lot of times, people are cowards when it comes to confronting someone on their behavior, they don't want to cause a scene, but it is on them then - the first ones out start insensitive and so they have the ones starting this - and then  you got the others allowing it to happen by not voicing what they say, do is wrong. 

    The ones supporting this is in the wrong as well. It's unfortunate that you happened to be surrounded by people who supported that, defending it, even. 

    The truth is your sister and boyfriend looks down on autistic people and they have limited knowledge of it, despite her being your very own sister and should know more of autism then what you could maybe expect the boyfriend knowing (if he does not have the same background, experiences as her).  

    In the end, the joke is on them.

Reply

  • No, you are not being too sensitive or stupid.

    What they did proves they have a lower emotional intelligence.

    As they are both the same way they most likely make a good fit, but everyone else around them suffers because of their insensitivity and stupidity. This time you were the victim of it. Next time someone else maybe. 

    The others telling you they did not mean it are acting either as "family rescuers" (taking the punches to keep the family together, so you basically have one half that enjoy the rid, the sacrifices the others are making), are afraid of conflicts, confrontational or are just as ignorant. 

    You must have felt even more alone, unsupported when actually the rest minimize what happened, confusing you, your feelings, the whole experience of it. Could be they missed all the signs of how it was said and the joke and sneer, but then again they were not the victim here or then paying enough attention. This weakened you more when you should have had emotional support.  

    But you know, a lot of times, people are cowards when it comes to confronting someone on their behavior, they don't want to cause a scene, but it is on them then - the first ones out start insensitive and so they have the ones starting this - and then  you got the others allowing it to happen by not voicing what they say, do is wrong. 

    The ones supporting this is in the wrong as well. It's unfortunate that you happened to be surrounded by people who supported that, defending it, even. 

    The truth is your sister and boyfriend looks down on autistic people and they have limited knowledge of it, despite her being your very own sister and should know more of autism then what you could maybe expect the boyfriend knowing (if he does not have the same background, experiences as her).  

    In the end, the joke is on them.

Children
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