Is autism an excuse for bad behaviour?

What do you think about this?

I think using autism as an excuse for bad behaviour is itself very naughty. When famous people do this, it harms autistic people because it implies that autism is a bad thing. Autistic people have enough difficulty gaining acceptance and understanding in this world – the ‘autism made me do it’ excuse makes advocacy and survival even harder. I've just posted a video about this [content removed by Moderator due to breaches of the online community rules and guidelines].

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  • I suppose it depends on one's 'spiky profile' etc. In my own case I think my autistic wiring has made me a compulsive people pleaser, accommodator, neurotic diplomat, mirrorer, and 'receivier' rather than 'broadcaster' of mood. Thus, most of my life has been spend in a state of bad behaviour being the most unlikely think I'm going to inflict on someone. And yet, because of over-calibration on that front, I've also put up with bad behaviour to me way more than I should, and have generally been one of the least assertive people on the planet. But that is changing, and the diagnosis (and therapy) has helped me get a little better there, maybe even a lot. In lost of small ways, nothing dramatic to the outside observer. And yet I think that finding that place between authenticity and performance in these life skills (ie. not just swapping one type of masking for another) is crucial to reducing frequency of burnout. 

    I'm grateful not to have been the inverse of what I'd described, but I know that the lever is indeed thrown the other way for many autistic people and I think that's overall the harder hand to have been dealt. Is it therefore an excuse? Somewhat, but moreso (as others have said) a reason, and with increased self-understanding, the excuse side of it becomes less robust... except , not to acknowledge the same tightrope walk being an imperfect compromise in *that* context would make me a hypocrite. So, um... dunno. Complicated isn't it?! 

  • You speak a lot of sense!! On most if not all of the above. My inner knobness only comes out among a very close set of people.

    The fact we know some behaviour might be classed as bad is what may lead to internalisation and thus self implosion. We know the manifestation of the opposite will be unacceptable to those around us. Neither are pleasant.

    On further thought with regards to the OP, these people on social media (not the OP, obvs) might be attention seeking whether they're aware of it or not. Or maybe feel they deserve special considerations. I'm very glad I don't partake in any of this (viewing etc) there's enough going on inside my brain, without more fodder.

    Let's just ALL be a bit kinder and understanding of others and ourselves. If people want to play up to it, let them. IMHO! 

Reply
  • You speak a lot of sense!! On most if not all of the above. My inner knobness only comes out among a very close set of people.

    The fact we know some behaviour might be classed as bad is what may lead to internalisation and thus self implosion. We know the manifestation of the opposite will be unacceptable to those around us. Neither are pleasant.

    On further thought with regards to the OP, these people on social media (not the OP, obvs) might be attention seeking whether they're aware of it or not. Or maybe feel they deserve special considerations. I'm very glad I don't partake in any of this (viewing etc) there's enough going on inside my brain, without more fodder.

    Let's just ALL be a bit kinder and understanding of others and ourselves. If people want to play up to it, let them. IMHO! 

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