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Overthinking, making decisions, worry, death

Dream

We are thinking of moving house, we have the opportunity to design our home to our specifications. I've spent months checking out every little detail and now is the time to make our decision I'm finding it so hard. My gut feeling is telling me it's the best move. We will be mortgage free (I'm 43) we will be over £1000 a month better off, it's a quiet, private estate in the country but near to amenities. When you drive on it feels like you are away from all the hustle and bustle of live but I'm thinking of everything that could go wrong. Neighbours, dogs barking, it won't be what I imagine, I don't need to worry about children because they can't live on there. I think it's all the stress of everything, the move, the packing, going through all the paperwork, designing the home. Now other things are worrying me, me dying alone if my partner dies before me, when you're dead you are gone forever it scares me, illness. I could go on forever. I have schizoaffective Disorder and I'm waiting for an autism assessment. Is this autism or my mental illness creeping in. I know it's normal to worry etc but I'm not sure what I'm experiencing is a normal level of worry

Parents

  • It is stressful, but I would love the chance to design and build my own house, have you thought of buying a kit house, like the Huff house, they're designed and built to your specifications, everything is built in in the factory and it all just slots together when brought by lorry to the site.

    What if's are terrible, the way I've dealt with mine are reality checking, asking myself how likely something is to happen right up to asking myself what I'd do if the sky fell on my head. Listen to your gut, it probably knows better than your head.

    People you don't like could move in next door to you now, I think theres always a bt of trepidation when new people move in next door, across the road and next door but one.

    I used to feel like you do about death, I found learning about the processes of death helped me not to fear it as much, I fear being in pain and the indignity of long term illness, but take comfort in the idea that if theres nothing there won't be any me to care, if there is something then I'll wake up dead in the afterlife and take things from there.

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  • It is stressful, but I would love the chance to design and build my own house, have you thought of buying a kit house, like the Huff house, they're designed and built to your specifications, everything is built in in the factory and it all just slots together when brought by lorry to the site.

    What if's are terrible, the way I've dealt with mine are reality checking, asking myself how likely something is to happen right up to asking myself what I'd do if the sky fell on my head. Listen to your gut, it probably knows better than your head.

    People you don't like could move in next door to you now, I think theres always a bt of trepidation when new people move in next door, across the road and next door but one.

    I used to feel like you do about death, I found learning about the processes of death helped me not to fear it as much, I fear being in pain and the indignity of long term illness, but take comfort in the idea that if theres nothing there won't be any me to care, if there is something then I'll wake up dead in the afterlife and take things from there.

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