The relationships and intimacy strategy thread

The purpose of this thread

Most autistic people seem to have issues with their love lives and forming romantic relationships. But most of us seem to really want it. So why don't we pool our knowledge?

This is a place to share what has and hasn't worked for you when it comes to finding sex and or love. Happy married? Tell us how it happened. Did your pick up line crash and burn? Tell us here.

This is the place to brainstorm on how to help autistic people improve their love lives whether that's a one night stand or finding the one and only love of their lives.

What is this thread not!

This is not a looking for a date thread.

This is not the place to moan about how afully hard dating is etc. Productive discussion please. Even if that's just learning from others mistakes.

Parents
  • I think that I have been incredibly lucky. My wife (together over 20 years) seems to like some autistic traits, and I think that two of her friends have autistic traits. My wife is totally NT and is neither introvert nor extrovert. I can say some of the things that she liked about me (this isn't to say that these are a guaranteed success with women!)

    • Honesty - her previous relationships consisted of a lot of (mind) game playing. I was just always honest. She saw that as 'maturity' at the time, but she does still value it even though it often gets me into trouble.
    • Never losing temper - her dad was a bit of a shouter and rather than looking for someone like that she preferred my even temper.
    • Kindness and thoughtfulness - I tried my best to be thoughtful and am naturally kind.

    I thought it important to point these things out because there is a seemingly big movement at the moment for not being a nice guy getting the ladies. All I can say is that these techniques may well get (some types of) ladies, but they won't be healthy relationships.

    If I think of other things, then I will come back to this thread.

Reply
  • I think that I have been incredibly lucky. My wife (together over 20 years) seems to like some autistic traits, and I think that two of her friends have autistic traits. My wife is totally NT and is neither introvert nor extrovert. I can say some of the things that she liked about me (this isn't to say that these are a guaranteed success with women!)

    • Honesty - her previous relationships consisted of a lot of (mind) game playing. I was just always honest. She saw that as 'maturity' at the time, but she does still value it even though it often gets me into trouble.
    • Never losing temper - her dad was a bit of a shouter and rather than looking for someone like that she preferred my even temper.
    • Kindness and thoughtfulness - I tried my best to be thoughtful and am naturally kind.

    I thought it important to point these things out because there is a seemingly big movement at the moment for not being a nice guy getting the ladies. All I can say is that these techniques may well get (some types of) ladies, but they won't be healthy relationships.

    If I think of other things, then I will come back to this thread.

Children
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