Autistic 'lightbulb moments'

Since your diagnosis/self realisation, have you had times in your life when suddenly you realise why you did something in the past ie because of your autism.

There have been many for me, but recently the hair cutting thread made me realise why I hated hairdressers so much even though everyone else I knew seemed to look forward to going.

I was the only person in my 30s I knew to have a mobile hairdresser come to my house - it seemed to be older people or those with mobility problems who went for this service.

Have you had moments when everything clicks into place/another piece of the puzzle of your past?

Parents
  • I always liked learning the names of things, like the proper names or the Latin names of plants. I repeated them over to myself just because I like the sound of them, and the knowing of them, or if I'm feeling anxious they are like a charm or spell that calms me down. I was telling myself the names of trees in my old workplace last night when I was walking to a dinner at restaurant that I had been invited to: "Cupressus macrocarpa, the Monterey cypress. Larix decidua, the European Larch. Alnus glutinosa, the black alder." 

  • I repeat random words in my head, often what I see it repeats in my head. Also things that I learned. Funny thing one of the words I used to repeat for very long time was Asperger. I saw some documentary about a man diagnosed with Asperger and that he was a math genius, and the word Asperger sounds so pleasant to me that it started repeating in my head. I also like sound of words such as sine, cosine (taste like vanilla), diameter, radius. Whole math tastes like fresh water so do these words. There were also words from geography such as stalactite and stalagmite, barhan or parabolic dune, riverbed. 

  • Synthesia, like you describe, is known to be associated with Autism. I had it when I was a kid, but lost it as I got older. It is one of the things that I envy. I miss seeing the days as colours.

  • I had it much stronger as a child, I also miss that colorful world. But I still experience it to some degree. I’m wondering if someone can have synesthesia, alexithymia, sensitivities, be clumsy and awkward but not be autistic. (Not only allistic, just neurotypical)

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