• Replies 20 replies
  • Subscribers 86 subscribers
  • Views 1080 views
  • Users 0 members are here
Options
Related
Hints and tips
  • To quote someone's message, first select/highlight the relevant text, and then use the Quote button that appears
  • To "mention" someone, type @ followed by the start of the forum name, and choose from the list; that person will get a notification of being mentioned

37 years old, recently dignosed and figuring it out

gkimmelman

Hi everyone

I'm 37 years old living in London. Earlier this year I was diagnosed with ASD which came as a big surprise to me. I never thought I had Autism. I always knew I was different and believed it was something like ADHD. Compared to my friends I always had some bad "struggles" which have led to some bad results: I dropped out of school, I dropped out of university, and in recent years I've been leaving job positions after 1 year. I've known I've been "struggling" with my mental health, and there have been behavioural patterns I've identified in recent years, however I have always been made to believe I have to just "get on with it" and couldn't allow my mental health to get in the way

It was only this year when my line manager, who disclosed to me that he got diagnosed with ASD during his childhood, asked if I was Autistic. Fast forward a few weeks, I have my first appointment with a therapist, and within the first 30 minutes they pause and ask if I was (diagnosed) Autistic. At this point I knew something was up, and the therapist assisted with a fast track ASD assessment.

I'm lucky for having an Autistic manager, and a mental health professional who was able to identify it, otherwise I would continue my life unknowing and not getting the necessary support.  I am also lucky at the time of the assessment I had private healthcare through the company I worked for, and I only had to pay a small excess fee (compared to the whopping £3000+ charge)

After getting the diagnosis there were plans on getting some support, however I left my job and consequentially lost the private healthcare which covered all the costs.

Now I'm trying to get the support again, but through a combination of NHS referral and self educating with books.

The diagnosis has been hard to swallow and I'm slowly coming to terms with it. There's a feeling of frustration and sadness that If I had been diagnosed earlier in my life, then I would generally be doing better in life both personally and professionally.

Looking back I can identify many behaviours as Autistic (or caused by being Autistic) which have caused some real struggles in my life. I've struggled to hold down jobs, and my former partners have struggled with me in relationships.

I'm trying to keep positive, and I still don't know what I'm doing or how to go about it. Hopefully the NHS will be able to provide support, and I'm looking to participate in local support groups in London and meet and connect with other neurodivergents.

That's me.

So how about you?

Can you relate to my journey?

Regardless of whether you can or not: What has your journey been like? Have you got the support you needed? If not, what you been doing to get that support?

And for those in employment: has your employer (and line manager) been supporting you and, if so, how?

Parents

  • Hi and welcome to the 'Latelings' club.

    The lack of support is a joke. It costs to buy support.

    My experience with my work has been really dreadful. It seems that I am to be tossed aside and to find a new role as my manager will not or cannot fulfill my requests for reasonable adjustments. I am 2 years on from disclosing my suspected ASD and over a year and a half since diagnosis (private).

    The most galling thing is that I work for the NHS and am being treated as a leper. So much for the caring profession.

  • in reply to Mr T

    Hi,

    I can totally relate to this, I used to work for the NHS and was pretty much bullied out. The workplace politics are awful. 

  • in reply to Cloud44

    I naively thought that I would be supported but told that if I was autistic I should know what barriers and challenges that I face in the workplace. A really awful thing to say to someone just diagnosed as autistic at age 53. For almost all of those years I had not even contemplated that I may be autistic.

    As you say the workplace politics are akin to to a school playground but only with adults that should know and act better. 

  • in reply to Cloud44

    This all sounds interesting and I've found paths seem to be tailored to help peopke function in society to an average level rather than those are are performing at a high level in industry or want to  perform at a high level and need a few helpful tweaks. 

    If I can find a specialist that has functional solutions then that will be really helpful I think as it's a case for me of how do I perform better and understand if I am burnout otherwise I just jeep going trying to get things done that is on my plate.

    Sounds like a few late similarities on people here. 

  • in reply to Mr T

    You've found out what barriers you face through years of battling through. Employers can be so ignorant. As you can tell, I haven't had a good history of work!! I could rant about it all day :-)

Reply Children
  • in reply to Cloud44

    This all sounds interesting and I've found paths seem to be tailored to help peopke function in society to an average level rather than those are are performing at a high level in industry or want to  perform at a high level and need a few helpful tweaks. 

    If I can find a specialist that has functional solutions then that will be really helpful I think as it's a case for me of how do I perform better and understand if I am burnout otherwise I just jeep going trying to get things done that is on my plate.

    Sounds like a few late similarities on people here.