How do I cope with being diagnosed as not autistic?

Hi

I have my assessment results meeting today and, thanks to some comments from the psychologist that was asking the questions in previous meetings, I'm expecting to be told that I'm not sufficiently impeded to be diagnosed autistic (I think that was the phrase she used). She identified traits but kept saying that people can have them without receiving a diagnosis.

I know I'm late to be worrying about this but I thought I had accepted this result until today. A few hours ago, I got into a bit of an argument with someone over something that really didn't matter. It turned out to be my fault and I had completely misunderstood the whole situation. It got me thinking again about everything that has turned out to be my fault and I've realised that I have only been pretending to myself that I've accepted this.

I will be seeing a psychiatrist today and I know that the diagnosis isn't given until they say it but, what do I do if she says that I'm not autistic? I'm not saying that I want to be autistic, but I'm very sure that I am.

This has probably been a waste of time for everybody who's read it as I can guess what some advice will be. I know there's nothing I can do to change the result and I have no idea how I will feel after whatever the result is until it comes. I am having thoughts of how I can avoid going to get the result but the result will always exist and people will know it, so the thought of others knowing something about me that I don't is probably enough to force me to go today.

Thanks for reading. If anybody is interested in finding out how the result made me feel, I'll see if I can update this later.