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Turning 30 in a couple of weeks and worried about my future...

AmyLR94

How do I start???
Well a few days ago I had a really bad worry moment, so much so that I was trying so hard not to cry to sleep. As you have read in the title I turn 30 in a couple of weeks, normally I'm really excited for my birthday but with everything that has been going on this year I've been more scared to hit 30 then I did when I hit 20.

For a while now I feel like I am missing something in my life, but I'm unsure on what that something would be. In July this year I started volunteering twice a week at a charity shop (which I love!) to help build my confidence and get some experience. I have been looking for part time jobs as well, but I haven't found anything that interest me or I'm qualified to do.

Some of you might of seen my last post about me mentioning about my dad and have had a lot like that happening which is causing me not to enjoy my life much. Another thing that has been on my mind is that (sorry for the tmi) I haven't had a period in 9 months. I'm not pregnant (still a virgin) but I have a doctors appointment next week to talk about this.

What has me worried are:
- I'm turning 30 and have no boyfriend and I'm still a virgin
- I'm scared that if I do end up with someone that they could end up like my dad
- I'm worried that because I haven't had a period that I could be infertile, which then makes me more worried that who would want to be with me when I can't have children.
- I have eczema prone skin - so again I keep thinking who would want a women who could be infertile and have eczema prone skin.
- I worried that if I meet someone that I will be taken advanced of because I don't understand certain things.
- I'm worried I will never find anyone since I don't go clubbing or to pubs etc 
- I'm worried about money all the time and end up spending my monthly money just to distract my thoughts (I find it very hard to budget)
- I haven't got a job - and I'm unsure what I am good at.

There are probably more for that list but basically I am terrified and I'm stuck. I don't know what to do with my life...I've been having feelings of wanting a baby too but know I can't afford to have a baby. I just see everyone else moving on with their lives and doing things that I feel unseen or lost. I know some of you will comment saying your still young and have plenty of time but my brain doesn't think that way. 

I know I'm probably repeating myself with the posts I put up on here but it's the only place I feel comfortable to express my thoughts and feelings to SobSob x

Parents

  • - I haven't got a job - and I'm unsure what I am good at.

    I was a teacher in the United States and at American schools abroad  for 32 years. During my last 15 years as a teacher, I taught vocational educaton and was a Culinary Arts instructor. There are all sorts of job counseling progams that are online. If you do an internet search for "free career aptitude test," you should get a list of the types of jobs that you might best be suited for. 

    If you were to apply for a job, please do not write "anything" as a response to  the question, 'What position are you applying for?' It is not theresponsibility of management or human resources to determine where your aptitute lies. 

    After you have an idea of what you might want to do, find a job website like Indeed.com to look for a job. 

    - I'm worried I will never find anyone since I don't go clubbing or to pubs etc 

    There are lots of ways to meet people. Most of my friends are people with whom I have shared a common interest. Some were met through volunteer groups. Others were met through Church,

    In addition to dating websites ae social sites like meetup.com. Meetup is a social website that allows people to form special interest groups. It's free to log-in. You start by inputting your location and local groups in your area will pop up. In my area there is a daytripper group (for people who want compionship during a day trip), a dinner and a movie group, yoga, baking, arts and crafts etc.

    - I'm worried about money all the time and end up spending my monthly money just to distract my thoughts (I find it very hard to budget)

    Find a job and put yourself on a budget. 

    - I worried that if I meet someone that I will be taken advantage of because I don't understand certain things.

    There are paid sites that will run criminal background checks on people. These sites are useful in confirming employment status, relationship status, education background, names of relatives, and the person's current and past residential addresses.

    - I'm scared that if I do end up with someone that they could end up like my dad

    Don't rush into a relationship. Take your time to get to know this person prior to making any emotional committment. 

Reply

  • - I haven't got a job - and I'm unsure what I am good at.

    I was a teacher in the United States and at American schools abroad  for 32 years. During my last 15 years as a teacher, I taught vocational educaton and was a Culinary Arts instructor. There are all sorts of job counseling progams that are online. If you do an internet search for "free career aptitude test," you should get a list of the types of jobs that you might best be suited for. 

    If you were to apply for a job, please do not write "anything" as a response to  the question, 'What position are you applying for?' It is not theresponsibility of management or human resources to determine where your aptitute lies. 

    After you have an idea of what you might want to do, find a job website like Indeed.com to look for a job. 

    - I'm worried I will never find anyone since I don't go clubbing or to pubs etc 

    There are lots of ways to meet people. Most of my friends are people with whom I have shared a common interest. Some were met through volunteer groups. Others were met through Church,

    In addition to dating websites ae social sites like meetup.com. Meetup is a social website that allows people to form special interest groups. It's free to log-in. You start by inputting your location and local groups in your area will pop up. In my area there is a daytripper group (for people who want compionship during a day trip), a dinner and a movie group, yoga, baking, arts and crafts etc.

    - I'm worried about money all the time and end up spending my monthly money just to distract my thoughts (I find it very hard to budget)

    Find a job and put yourself on a budget. 

    - I worried that if I meet someone that I will be taken advantage of because I don't understand certain things.

    There are paid sites that will run criminal background checks on people. These sites are useful in confirming employment status, relationship status, education background, names of relatives, and the person's current and past residential addresses.

    - I'm scared that if I do end up with someone that they could end up like my dad

    Don't rush into a relationship. Take your time to get to know this person prior to making any emotional committment. 

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