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I would like your opinion please

JustBe

Hi,

I've finally got to the point where I don't want to mask anymore -  I'm 54 years old. I discovered that I was Autistic just under a year ago. 

I'm so TIRED of having to listen to gossip and people's problems. Of feeling like I have to make conversation, when I don't want to (just to be polite). For having to make eye contact when I don't want to. From feeling so anxious around people. 

I've been looking at hoodies with slogans on today, to try and get my message across. I don't want to appear too rude. 

How about 

a) low social battery                                                         b) nope not today                                                               c) not socially awkward, but would rather be at home with my Guinea pig  (sarcasm)                                           d) one stating I'm autistic 

Or something else. Any ideas ? 

Parents

  • I would maybe consider something like: I’m not rude, it’s just hard for me to suddenly find answers to your attempts to make small talk” 

    maybe too long. But it describes why I’m so awkward when someone is trying to make small talk with me. Especially when they interrupt what I was doing or thinking (most of the time) and expect me to socialize which for me doesn’t make any sense. 
    i also had to deal with gossipers at work, but I’ve sorted out quickly. I just sit and “grey stone” them, without any emotions, no reaction, they stop themselves. Or if someone start gossips about someone else from the company, I also sometimes answer something like “I like him/her” “ I think she/he is doing a good job” etc. then I get weird look and the person who was trying to make me engage into gossips stops talking to me and doesn’t do it anymore. This maybe awkwardness and honesty helped me win good colleagues at work who support me and trust me and treat with respect. They told me literally that they trust me because I don’t gossip. I didn’t have to do much to unmask to be honest. When I compare myself before and after realisation- there is not much difference. I got used to hearing “wrong with me” but I already know the answer. 
    we deserve to be ourselves 

Reply

  • I would maybe consider something like: I’m not rude, it’s just hard for me to suddenly find answers to your attempts to make small talk” 

    maybe too long. But it describes why I’m so awkward when someone is trying to make small talk with me. Especially when they interrupt what I was doing or thinking (most of the time) and expect me to socialize which for me doesn’t make any sense. 
    i also had to deal with gossipers at work, but I’ve sorted out quickly. I just sit and “grey stone” them, without any emotions, no reaction, they stop themselves. Or if someone start gossips about someone else from the company, I also sometimes answer something like “I like him/her” “ I think she/he is doing a good job” etc. then I get weird look and the person who was trying to make me engage into gossips stops talking to me and doesn’t do it anymore. This maybe awkwardness and honesty helped me win good colleagues at work who support me and trust me and treat with respect. They told me literally that they trust me because I don’t gossip. I didn’t have to do much to unmask to be honest. When I compare myself before and after realisation- there is not much difference. I got used to hearing “wrong with me” but I already know the answer. 
    we deserve to be ourselves 

Children
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