jokes

I was thinking of doing a thread of jokes and humor.

on Thursday  my evening routine went out without any fore warning cause someone who doesnt know my evening routine due to not being with me in the evening and stuff told the person who was going to be with me this evening who doesnt know my routine either and there waa some sort of mis communication

for context

she aparantly told me out of nowhere when i was having my meds but she started going on about something else aswell and I was unable to process everything cause it takes longer than normal for me to process things cause of my learning disability sometimes

but also cause I had a sore throat that kept me up the previous night and my sore throat has been worse today Iv been taking something for it.  I dont tend to cope with them well cause they afect the texsture of food i will eat and im very fussy about texture anyway and so was too distracted by all that.  

she was also talking too fast for me to process the words and sentences  and I thought she was just going over my usual routine and so didnt pay much attention cause I already know it and she aparantly thought I agreed with certain  times that ended up throwing my routine out the window and I was completely unaware of any changes until the last minute

when I t told her what she said didnt make sense cause its not my routine and she didnt take that well when I told her and I found the change odd and it caused lots of upset to my routine

so cause of everything that happened that  evening im even more up for humor and laughter and for that reason and the fact I was thinking about doing a joke and humor thread anyway there is no better time time like the  present to make people laugh 

here are some jokes and humor I have come up with so far 

I make up funny words in my head to use as alternatives to rude words or swear words so thought it would be one cool idea to do with humor 

when I was a child  I mainly copyed my speacial interests rather than my parents and although they have a habit of swearing sometimes I still chose not to copy them and so have never been known to swear  ever since I was little and dont do it even when alone instead I automaticaly come out with all sorts of  funny things as always but  thats just me. I like making up funny words  and my brain automaticaly says funny things instead and so I come up with all sorts of funny things even when im fustraited or iv realised iv made a mistake ir I have an acident so thought funny words would be a good idea cause its a type of humor I could use for the joke thread 

heres one of my favourate funny things I say 

oh flap- referance to birds flapping when startled 

but its the flapping part i find funny and one of my favourate phraises 

next I like different types of humor 

what do you get when  a crab gets into a fight 

an all out brawl 

what do you get when a  teritorial  shore  crab crosses   paths with a  hermit? krabby 

then theres other funny humor and jokes to come up with aswell. although its about wildlife it can be about anything and thought it would be a good idea for a thread 

Parents
  • this time we had Dad jokes as the navigation in the car he said turn left and if you wonder where that goes it doesnt it stays 

    take the first exit. first.   dont worry I wont steer you wrong

     as soon as we arived it blurted out we have arived! in a exited and reliefed way then it said while chickling now I guess its time to re- tire 

  • Your dad has lots of voices for his sat nav. My first sat nav was an old one given to me by my brother and we were stuck with a John Cleese voice until I worked out how to change it. My wife still copies him at the end of the journey - "You have arrived at your destination, you can get out now but I'm not going to carry your bags for you"

  • he does actualy. some are funnier than others. the joke one was quiet worrying in a funny way cause of the amount of times he kept saying he wont steer Dad wrong and the fact he says about re-tireing when you arive which of course means getting new tires 

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