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So how long does this "acceptance" sh*t take then?

JamesB
1 month ago

Hmmm.......so 4 months into my 'diagnosed' state (48yo), and I'm not feeling a whole heap of acceptance. I am still feeling quite bitter and resentful. Everything I see around me in life and at work seems to have been, and continues to be, designed with a slightly different species in mind.

I have started reading this forum more often, even though I'm scared of keep seeing my reflection in these threads, and am following some overtly divergent contributors on Facebook. I was skeptical that at my age, with my history, that I could somehow find 'inner peace' (I mean, really - what the hell is that even supposed to mean?), but at the moment I'm heading in the opposite direction. Those long-cherished hopes of finding the right therapy, the right antidepressant to 'sort me out' seem absurd. 

I recall seeing a quite old entry on here where a user refers to feeling much better about the state of things 4 years in. FOUR YEARS? (yes, I am shouting). I don't think I can maintain even the current crumbling facade for another 3+ years. Especially now I recognize the effort I am putting in, and the energy this costs me.

Parents
  • 1 month ago

    I can totally relate. I’m in my mid-fifties and was diagnosed about 3 weeks ago. My brain is a trash fire right now. My immediate family have been great, the couple of people I’ve disclosed too have been kind of dicks about it. ’s advice downthread has been quite helpful about forgiving other people, but advice only ever gets you so far. I think we all have to find our own way. The one thing I’ve learned from this forum (prepare for attack of the blindingly obvious) is that autism affects us all different ways, so other people’s experiences as helpful, kind and useful as they often are don’t always apply.

    I wonder if there’s value in asking yourself what peace looks like? (At the risk of sounding like a U2 song) What it is that you’re looking for? Apologies if this all sounds pretty bland and self-evident.

Reply
  • 1 month ago

    I can totally relate. I’m in my mid-fifties and was diagnosed about 3 weeks ago. My brain is a trash fire right now. My immediate family have been great, the couple of people I’ve disclosed too have been kind of dicks about it. ’s advice downthread has been quite helpful about forgiving other people, but advice only ever gets you so far. I think we all have to find our own way. The one thing I’ve learned from this forum (prepare for attack of the blindingly obvious) is that autism affects us all different ways, so other people’s experiences as helpful, kind and useful as they often are don’t always apply.

    I wonder if there’s value in asking yourself what peace looks like? (At the risk of sounding like a U2 song) What it is that you’re looking for? Apologies if this all sounds pretty bland and self-evident.

Children