No purpose

I have absolutely no purpose and not a lot of luck

I am exhausted and struggle to accept that my life will always be suffering.

I am in my mid forties, no family or partner. No job or savings. 

My life is a mess. My flat is even a mess now.

I am in therapy. But they aren't trained to work with AuDHD.

It's NHS, so I can't just change. 

I had a very abusive and traumatic childhood and I should work through that. However, I need to find a job to pay my rent. I struggle to get out of bed.