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My appraisal

aimosan

I just received my appraisal last week and a few things appeared in it that I'm not really surprised about.

 

1.  I become flustered when I come across a new problem or situation.

2.  I become flustered when I meet new people.

3.  I work well on my own once given specific instructions for a task.

4.  Can be quite blunt and abrupt when talking to people.

 

Overall it was a good appraisal.  They understand why the above points were made and they just accept me for who I am, but there are other people in the business who don't understand me as much as my colleagues in my section and I've been told I have to try and get to know them and conversate with them a bit more.  The people in this department are higher up than me, more technical people in the IT industry.  I'm told that not getting on with them may affect my chances of moving on up in the world.  I do get on with a few of them, but a few of them are quite social people and like to brown nose, I think the term is, and will do whatever it takes to make themselves look better.  I don't take any of that nonsense so I do cause friction between me and them sometimes when I catch them out.

The thing is I don't want to move on up in the world of IT, I'm only here for job security and money, and the fact I can do this job at a basic level.  I'm very good at my job but I don't enjoy it, which is maybe why I have no problem challenging authority.  I did this all the time in school classes I didn't particular enjoy.  Probably bored.  I spend my lunchtimes reading science magazines and chemistry textbooks, because that is what I enjoy and in school I never fell out with any of my science or art teachers.

I've tried to explain to my employers that I've worked very hard over the years to increase my social skills, but there's a fine line between being more social and being someone I am not.  They try and encourage me to do what I can but I really don't think I'm going to change any.  Except, maybe stop being so blunt with my boss.  Maybe.

 

Problem is I've lost a lot of my confidence but I would like a job where social interaction isn't the main focus.  I feel much better now I'm not one of the people that has to answer the phone all day, but I do have to go out and visit people throughout the day to sort their IT problems and I feel awkward when they're sitting about me trying to make small talk while I work on something I'm not all that interested in.  I also don't know if just raising my confidence here would help or if going to a different job would be jumping out of the frying pan into the fire, as my last manager said.  I don't want to make things worse for myself.

Parents

  • What is OP?

     

    Freelancing is definitely not an option for me.  The lack of structure from having a routine and a job title would work for me, and I'd also have to network and get to know people which I also couldn't do.  I also don't enjoy IT all that much.  The only way I'd probably enjoy it is if I had a business analyst type IT job where I work on my own projects and show my work, but being told I may not be able to work up to that because of my social skills I don't see that happening either.  I'd ideally like a job in science so I'm looking at doing some study courses to give myself something to focus on in my spare time.  I know every element on the periodic table and have books on elements and rocks.  I love rocks and the elements that make them up so it's makes an ideal career for me.  But, yes, my confidence is suffering.  Especially in this job because it's quite social focussed so there is lots of places for my confidence to drop and for others to find ways to put me down on criticise me.  I have used a similar saying before, telling me to sort out my social skills is like telling a paralysed person to get up and walk.

     

    I'm hoping that doing this science course, which is introductory to a degree in Chemistry, will help improve my confidence.  I was told in school that I was stupid and disruptive and I would never amount to much.  Was told not to apply to university as there was no point in me going, so I never went through the uni applying process at school.  It's only now I'm starting to get the confidence together to start a course and show people what I am capable of.

     

    I like that saying where if you judge a fish by it's ability to climb a tree then it is going to spend it's life thinking it's stupid.  Well, I find tat with most people on the autism spectrum.  A lot of my friends in school were the special needs kids, having Down's Syndrome, etc, but they were some of the most intelligent, loveliest people I've ever met, so I don't understand why the rest of the world are so quick to dismiss us and not make use of our strengths.

     

    There is an IT company, I think in Denmark, that employs people on the autistic spectrum because their ability to concentrate on their work with very little mistakes and for their intelligence.  It would be nice for companies to understand what a great asset autistic people our in the workplace.

Reply

  • What is OP?

     

    Freelancing is definitely not an option for me.  The lack of structure from having a routine and a job title would work for me, and I'd also have to network and get to know people which I also couldn't do.  I also don't enjoy IT all that much.  The only way I'd probably enjoy it is if I had a business analyst type IT job where I work on my own projects and show my work, but being told I may not be able to work up to that because of my social skills I don't see that happening either.  I'd ideally like a job in science so I'm looking at doing some study courses to give myself something to focus on in my spare time.  I know every element on the periodic table and have books on elements and rocks.  I love rocks and the elements that make them up so it's makes an ideal career for me.  But, yes, my confidence is suffering.  Especially in this job because it's quite social focussed so there is lots of places for my confidence to drop and for others to find ways to put me down on criticise me.  I have used a similar saying before, telling me to sort out my social skills is like telling a paralysed person to get up and walk.

     

    I'm hoping that doing this science course, which is introductory to a degree in Chemistry, will help improve my confidence.  I was told in school that I was stupid and disruptive and I would never amount to much.  Was told not to apply to university as there was no point in me going, so I never went through the uni applying process at school.  It's only now I'm starting to get the confidence together to start a course and show people what I am capable of.

     

    I like that saying where if you judge a fish by it's ability to climb a tree then it is going to spend it's life thinking it's stupid.  Well, I find tat with most people on the autism spectrum.  A lot of my friends in school were the special needs kids, having Down's Syndrome, etc, but they were some of the most intelligent, loveliest people I've ever met, so I don't understand why the rest of the world are so quick to dismiss us and not make use of our strengths.

     

    There is an IT company, I think in Denmark, that employs people on the autistic spectrum because their ability to concentrate on their work with very little mistakes and for their intelligence.  It would be nice for companies to understand what a great asset autistic people our in the workplace.

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