Published on 12, July, 2020
I saw someone who works for the mental health team today and for the umpteenth time they've left me feeling worse, not better, after seeing them, but I carry on with it because I don't want to upset the apple cart and am waiting to be transferred to a new Autism team.
I have no friends, no one to confide in, I just feel like crying.
Please don't be cross with me.....I know this makes me sound like a bit of a try-to-do-gooder-helmet-type......but I prefer that impression being created about myself compared to the thought of you getting sore eyes and sinking deeper into lonely isolation. I care, because I have been where you describe....at times I just needed something - anything - to keep me looking up, rather than staring down into the abyss.
I simply suggest a walk to you. Nothing fancy, no aim, rhyme nor reason....just a simple walk.
When I was "proper down", being proactive with myself, was what kept me sane (just about!)
A walk enabled me to feel connected to the world, even though I wasn't......and that kept me going until I was ready (or the world was ready, depending on your perspective) for some better connections to develop. And in case you are wondering - yes, things did, eventually, after a long dark time, improve for me.
Don't despair......you only need one to care......and whilst I am sure there are others around you that you can't see yet.....let me assure you that I can be your "one to care" at this moment........because I do.
Your weirdass "friend" of sorts.
Number.
Thanks for the reply, I'm too mentally worn out to make an interesting or tactful reply but I appreciate your thoughts and sympathy.
Understood brother. Rest easy.