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I feel like not fully grown up/mature

Alien0n3arth

Does anyone else feel like this? It’s so hard to regulate emotions after someone screamed at me or I had a misunderstanding and feel like a total idiot and loser for not understanding or asking questions. Strong light, sounds of scanners, people talking and laughing loud, strollers being moved on the floor and many other sounds that usually don’t make me feel disregulated today made me crazy and crying I had to hide so no one sees me crying. It was so hard to calm down and soothe myself. I pressed my forehead with my hands and sat for few minutes. This is why I feel like a child in an adult body. Terribly embarrassing. I’m high functioning- I’m a child functioning in adult world and trying to cope. Does anyone have any thoughts, advice, experience, stories to share, I’ll be happy. 

Parents

  • I often feel like I haven't matured fully. I don't go as far as crying a lot, but I'll internalise a lot of negative feelings as I've done it my whole life. Right now I'm feeling like no one wants me so I'm feeling lonely. I watch groups of people as they pass by and think they seemed to have figured out all this adult stuff - they actually all natural together, whereas I've got to plan out socialising which is exhausting eventually. I just think that if I were a real adult then lots of things would be easier.

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  • I often feel like I haven't matured fully. I don't go as far as crying a lot, but I'll internalise a lot of negative feelings as I've done it my whole life. Right now I'm feeling like no one wants me so I'm feeling lonely. I watch groups of people as they pass by and think they seemed to have figured out all this adult stuff - they actually all natural together, whereas I've got to plan out socialising which is exhausting eventually. I just think that if I were a real adult then lots of things would be easier.

Children
  • in reply to pdaddio83
    pdaddio83 said:
    I just think that if I were a real adult then lots of things would be easier.

    This! I wondered my whole life, how others do everything so easily not showing or having any stress. This is also a reason that I always felt and often still feel inferior despite knowing, that I’m not alone and what might be the reason. 

  • in reply to pdaddio83

    Bless you! I totally hear where you are coming from there, I have felt like that many times over the years even to the point when I have been with a group of friends, I've disappeared because I suddenly felt like I was not good enough, it is bloody hard and exhausting!  But I realise with the help of my partner  and good friends that it is part of me,  I realise that I am more akin to a 15 year old boy and I'm learning to accept that as part of me and with the help of my partner placing the boundaries that I need to function,  don't get me wrong I do adult things naturally but the boy inside of me is a big part too.  Don't ever put yourself down, you like everyone is an individual,  remember you are you and you are fabulous, sadly there is such an obsession with defining people due to age , sex and gender and what is expected,  think it's alot of cods wallop,  this is half the trouble for us, lack of understanding in others