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I feel like not fully grown up/mature

Alien0n3arth

Does anyone else feel like this? It’s so hard to regulate emotions after someone screamed at me or I had a misunderstanding and feel like a total idiot and loser for not understanding or asking questions. Strong light, sounds of scanners, people talking and laughing loud, strollers being moved on the floor and many other sounds that usually don’t make me feel disregulated today made me crazy and crying I had to hide so no one sees me crying. It was so hard to calm down and soothe myself. I pressed my forehead with my hands and sat for few minutes. This is why I feel like a child in an adult body. Terribly embarrassing. I’m high functioning- I’m a child functioning in adult world and trying to cope. Does anyone have any thoughts, advice, experience, stories to share, I’ll be happy. 

Parents

  • Really interesting thread 

    I get told I’m like a teenager and not a husband on many occasions. As you have all mentioned I have tantrums or meltdowns, can cry over many things and can feel like my body is going to burst from trying to keep too much in. 
    My therapist said being like a child is only ruined by expectation of other adults because it’s what we are supposed to do. I no longer apologise for being this way because it is what helps regulate me. It doesn’t stop me feeling guilty though. 

    Alienated I try to take myself away for my (take5) breaks and let it out or just be still, I sometimes rock side to side, jiggle my legs around and bite all the skin from around my nails and inside my mouth and I feel a little better and half able to return to what I was doing. 
    I do also find these things embarrassing but without these ways of coping how bad would things be? 

    I hope you are all coping in your own ways and wish you all well

  • in reply to Take5

    I too get told on many occasions that I behave like a teenage boy rather than a man but it's simply the only way I find I can cope with the adult world, and often can only see things through a teenage boys eyes.  I too have tantrums,  It is the only way I can release what's inside and like you I feel bad but it's who I am,  I find living in the adult world so very difficult 

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  • in reply to Take5

    I too get told on many occasions that I behave like a teenage boy rather than a man but it's simply the only way I find I can cope with the adult world, and often can only see things through a teenage boys eyes.  I too have tantrums,  It is the only way I can release what's inside and like you I feel bad but it's who I am,  I find living in the adult world so very difficult 

Children