Published on 12, July, 2020
I am part of a group of 4 heterosexual couples and today I discovered the other 3 men, I have known for about 10 years, went to watch the Rugby in France this weekend. It was never mentioned to me, and it has triggered so many childhood traumas of being excluded by those you are supposed to be close to.
I don't really know hope to cope with this, all the feelings of failure have hit me hard, and I am in my 60s. I just feel so broken tonight and want to shut myself away from the world. I want to end my relationship with my partner to avoid ever seeing these people again. Am I being irrational?
Definitely ok to feel hurt and let down. It’s one thing to be asked and say no, but to be excluded from the start is not nice. I don’t know what the answer is, but just wanted to offer my opinion that it’s ok to feel how you’re feeling.
My reaction would be the same as yours, I would want to hide and never speak to them again, I know that asking them why they excluded you is the right thing to do, but I'm not sure I could do it without a melt down.
I nearly had a meltdown last night - I think I am still very close to one.