Published on 12, July, 2020
So many times I’ve bumped into someone I haven’t seen for a while or maybe someone even texted me after a while, and they say “we should meet up and do x”.
In 100% of cases they never get back in touch to do x. In 100% of the small proportion of cases where I’ve approached them to take them up on their offer to do x, some excuse is manufactured and x does not happen.
So WHY do people say this?
I understand, by now, that people saying these things, with no sincerity whatsoever, is merely an NT social ritual.
But I still don't get it. What's the point?
It's definitely largely an "avoiding confrontation" thing, especially if both parties don't know how to express it without potentially upsetting each other.
Well, ok, that sort of makes sense, avoiding confrontation.
But the whole making pretend arrangements to meet thing, which both parties know are a fiction...
It's bizarre.
Sometimes it's like looking into a goldfish bowl from the outside.
HMO said:, I'd never say I'd want to meet someone if I don't because it's not fair on them.
I wouldn't either.
I've been guilty of it myself, so I can't criticise others for doing it. The avoiding confrontation bit anyway, I'd never say I'd want to meet someone if I don't because it's not fair on them.