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Do you struggle with conflict?

Miss Understood

I’m sure nobody likes conflict but I feel that as an autistic person it’s something I handle particularly badly. I get into a panicky state and I am quick to apologise, even over-apologise, whether I am in the wrong or not. I become overwhelmed with guilt and self-hate. The last conflict I led me to experiencing signs of (passive) suicide ideation as I felt so bad about myself. I won’t call out the other person’s behaviour as I just want to “fix” the situation as quickly as possible. Instead I roll over for them and allow them to walk all over me. I really hate that I’m like this, it makes me feel so weak and pathetic. 

Parents

  • Oh I am terrible with conflict. The problem I have is that in a situation where I'm expected to have an immediate response to something in the moment, I'm terrible with it.

    It's worse when other autistic people don't understand that I need time to process things, and instead expect me to respond like a neurotypical person. That particular example was, for a number of reasons, the worst thing that ever happened to me.

    So yeah, you're not alone.

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  • Oh I am terrible with conflict. The problem I have is that in a situation where I'm expected to have an immediate response to something in the moment, I'm terrible with it.

    It's worse when other autistic people don't understand that I need time to process things, and instead expect me to respond like a neurotypical person. That particular example was, for a number of reasons, the worst thing that ever happened to me.

    So yeah, you're not alone.

Children