Published on 12, July, 2020
Hello,
I am always overthinking in relationships as recently, I broke up with my ex a while ago and we have reminded friends until recently, they have always known about my Autism & OCD tendencies and have been rather supportive of them & not bothered by them which is a good thing. But recently they told me how they felt and something didn't sit right with me, did they feel that way because I was autistic, I always truly felt that I was strange or something, always talking myself down. But then they told me some stuff and it brought it up all back up.
It's like I think, can I find someone who I could have a relationship with? Without showing my tendencies or anything like that.
I would love to hear some feedback on how you cope in relationships, I have always struggled but I struggle with my emotions and explaining them.
You definitely can and I'm sure you will one day, probably without meaning to, that's how I found my now wife.
Growing up I went through life being quiet and socially awkward. I tried to be like everyone else but I just couldn't. I can talk, I can interact with people but I interact differently, in my own way. Most people don't understand it. But sometimes you find the people who take the time to understand you and will be patient.
I've not met many of those but they do exist.
I've always wanted friends and a girlfriend since I was at school. I always hoped I would make a friend but never expected to get a girlfriend.
And then I did! It was so random and my own clumsiness caused it. I went to the shops because I wanted some strawberry jam and the online shopping system didn't have any jam in stock until Friday but I needed it that day. So I went to the shop and it turned out they had loads in stock lol and then at the checkout I grabbed my bags and went out to my car, keeping my head down as I do, so I don't make eye contact.
In the parking lot a woman came up to me with her own bags and the first thing she said was "don't be nervous". I really appreciated that and felt a little less anxious after. And then she proceeded to say that I had accidentally picked up one of her shopping bags. I was really apologetic and felt an idiot and thought I might have a meltdown but she must have seen how worked up I was getting because she said "hey it's ok, no harm done and don't worry I do this sort of thing all the time". She said she came out with someone else's trolley last week.
Originally I thought that wasn't true and she was just trying to make me feel better but it turns out that was a true event. A well matched pair!
This chance encounter because of my clumsy nature led me to meet this woman and she and I have now been boyfriend and girlfriend for 4 years
So guys, it can and does happen. Don't give up on yourselves or on the hope of dating and always be yourself.
After the parking lot incident she suggested we get a coffee and I said could we drink them next to my car because it's a comfort item for me and she was fine with that.
Going shopping that day was the best decision I've ever made!