Feel guilty for being autistic

When I got diagnosed with the following three things, OCD, High Anxiety and Autism it was suggested for me to research, join forums etc to help me because services in the NHS are so limited. However I have found social media awareness from fellow autistic people so valuable. But every time I see comments stating that everyone is autistic these days, its a trend, its attention seeking, if you don't have high support needs you aren't autistic and attention seeking. People who are autistic are the minority these days and 80% are autistic. Then I'd see these people argue with those who respond explaining how difficult their day to day can be.

now I want to make clear in this post that those who are considered high support needs level 3 do need to be advocated for and I will never understand the level of difficulty they may go through on a day to day basis.

But I type this post feeling like a fake and bad for being autistic myself. I have struggled all my life and being trying desperately to find out from doctors what is wrong with me. Have I had mental health problems, was it hormonal issues, is there a physical problem causing the issues or am I just a bad person. I've desperately wanted help and answers and I have waited decades to know. Then I find out there was nothing wrong with me, I was just autistic, wired differently and that's ok. I can learn about myself more.

The other day I had what felt like a panic attack in the street, my son had a meltdown, he's on a waiting list for an autism assessment too. I knew what the problem was but that didn't stop a car in the street stopping to check if everything is OK. That made me feel like I had done something wrong and I wanted to just go back home and lock myself in the house, I barely go out as it is as I struggle to leave the house due to the outside world. So I now wear a sunflower lanyard and because of seeing comments like this on social media I even feel guilty for doing that.

I think going forward I will not read comments on social media, there's my downfall.

But I feel so bad right now because I am autistic.