Published on 12, July, 2020
I’ve worked in hospitality/customer service the whole of my adult life and always struggled, My recent autism diagnosis has made me realise how detrimental pushing myself to do this job is to my wellbeing. I have a meeting with work tomorrow to make reasonable adjustments - I’m on a zero hour contract as well and barely getting by with benefits. My mood is so slow and anxiety so high at the minute I’m struggling to do anything. I’ve applied to some remote jobs and disability benefits but feel like a failure. I’m just so tired of pushing myself to do things like this when it’s so stressful for me. I’m not sure what adjustments can be made or to go off work sick? Just feel so guilty because I love working and don’t want people to think I’m being lazy. I feel lazy by not working but I’m struggling, and rent and bills are so high.
I could have written this. Its horrible isnt it. I feel capable which leads me to think i want to work but i dont feel well and get so fatigued. Worked hard all my life but i cant do it anymore. In my mind i want to, but i dont think i can. Maybe we are so used to trying so hard that it is now difficult to accept that this is no longer the case? Try not to worry what people think, you know how you feel. Maybe take some time off x