Published on 12, July, 2020
I'm in my late 20s and have been curious about dating for quite a long time. I've wanted to try dating for ages, never have because of anxiety but since my dad got sick I realized if I leave it too late potentially my partner might not meet my parents, and if we had kids my kids might not know their grandparents and that's an upsetting thought and a worry but it's a realistic worry.
So with the above in mind I'm interested in dating and determined to give it a try in the next couple of months. I'm currently working at a preschool nursery, really fun job, the kids are great and the staff are all amazing and very supportive and understanding of my autism, even when I've unfortunately let them down and been unable to go in because my autism and anxiety were triggered. I couldn't wish to work in a better environment. The noise can be a bit much at times but when this happens I can go outside or in to the staff room. It's ideal for me and I love every second of it. I suffered a mental breakdown four years ago. At the time I never saw a future of myself where I would be well, happy and able to work and yet this hypothetical future is now a reality. Even now it feels like a dream.
Has anyone experience of dating and relationships with autism?
Would you say an autistic partner is best or do relationships with neurotypicals work out
And do you think it's worth me trying to do this? I've read so many accounts of dating for someone with autism and I know it's a bit of a lottery. I worry if I'm unsuccessful. I try not to overthink it though!
I'm lucky the woman who employed me is helping me try to become independent and I've considered asking her thoughts on this too.
This is a difficult subject as we all have our diffrent traits. I am 54 and married for 18 years to a 'normal woman' but until internet dating came along it was hell. I never got relationships as a teen, no siblings, parents not loving, boys only school, I didn't have a clue. Even when I started meeting women when I started work I just didn't get the whole thing. Only when I got my own place and the internet arrived didn't I get anywhere.
I think i would massivley struggle now as I am not the same person I was when I met my wife. I had no idea I had ASD and ADHD and suffered a massive meltdown in 2020 I have not fully recovered from. I think now if I became single I would just want a girlfriend and live on my own. It can work, I knew I never wanted kids from i was very young and now see I would have never handled it, I am far too selfish. It is basically down to three things, first actually being active in looking and the second is luck, then it takes work.