Focus and paying attention

@Longman -

It is true, I can only seem to have one or no process going in at one time.  If one person is talking to me, but another person is standing beside me talking to someone else, I have trouble telling the difference between the 2 and I have to tell the person I can't hear them.  Also, I feel asleep on a speaker once (a large music speaker) when I was staying round at a friends house.  I've also had people who have had to physically touch me because I haven't noticed them talking to me.  While it was playing music.  It was as if the sound wasn't there to me.  I have lost track of looking after myself.  Your suggestion of eye covers is one I haven't thought of.  I think as long as my bed is clear of belongings it shouldmake a suitable area.  I bought big over ear headphones too to wear when noie gets a bit much, sometimes even if I'm not listening to music they are quite comforting.  I should use them more.  But, you're right.  You've reminded me that when things become too much I do overload.  At the moment it's nearly a year since I lost my grandmother, who was also on the autistic spectrum and was like my second mother, and I own a house with my ex, which I don't stay in, but I rent my half out and I don't want to be a part of that anymore.  It's just a lot for this time of year...

@IntenseWorld

I've never thought of Dermatillomania before.  I will find that if I'm sitting looking at the TV, or something like that, I will sit and pick at my skin.  I do it on my legs and face mainly, or just anwhere where I feel there is something on my skin I need to get rid of.  I have oily skin and acne, even though my acne has cleared up a lot over the years, but I feel lik I have to get the 'evil' out of my skin and if I can get even the smallest amount of dirt out of my skin, or if there is dry skin, I will go out of my way to have a go at it.  I can't stand the thought of having something on my skin that should be there.  I'm terrified of tics and leeches too, so there's probably something there that's linked.  My boyfriend gets concerned if I come out of the bathroom with a red face. 

Also, I do, most of the time, work on a flexitime.  It's just when I'm covering holidays I have a time to be in at work.  My line manager knows of my problems and they are quite supportive of me.  It's mainly myself who is giving me the hard time.  It's also harder because I was told it was 99.99% (without officials saying so the doctors weren't allowed to sa 100%) likely I had Asperger's syndrome, but living in the north of scotland, and being an adult, there was no one willig to put me through a diagnosis, so without that 'official' status I don't feel worthy of people being lenient with me.  I sit at my desk with my big headphones on sometimes, but the big bosses sometimes walk past and was wondering why I was listening to music during work (headphones weren't even plugged in).  Again, work is supportve, it's mainly me that's being hard on myself.

As a new years resolution I'm determined to gethe diagnosis, as it's been 3 years since it was first mentioned, and to also get the support I need as I've moved to a new city and my current doctor wants to treat everything with medication, which isn't really helping long term.  I really want more CBT, so I should try and focus on that.

Thanks for taking time to get back to me

The ironic thing is, researchers think people with autism don't daydream.  Which of course is ridiculous.  You may have slight dermatillomania (skin picking) but the overall issue is likely executive dysfunction.

I wish I could give you some magic answers, I have a history of being late for everything, even when getting up on time.  One job even bought me an alarm clock as they thought I was oversleeping.

The only solution I can see is asking for flexi-time and other reasonable adjustments so that you can cope.

Perhaps if you could clarify what is worrying you, as there seems to be two things here, to which you may be alluding as regards "ditsy daydreamer".

One is not being aware of goings on around you because you are switching off.

The other is getting focussed so much you forget what you were doing. That can also prevent you noticing what's happening around you.

I think people switch off if they reach overload, or just at some point where external noise is involuntarily blanked out in total, whereas NTs would filter out only part of the environment. For my part, if I'm walking along a busy road I lose awareness then it suddenly switches back in very suddenly. I've come across others who switch off entirely, even when walking, almost like some form of epilepsy.

But if you are very focussed on something that can also cause you to lose touch with the outside world.

As to relaxation, you can get relaxation tapes/cds from your GP - well they used to dish them out irrespective of the cause to anyone complaining of stress - maybe they've stopped doing it. But the principle is to lie down and tense and relax parts of your body, especially to reduce neck and back tension. If you do this several times a day it helps you spot when you are getting stressed, so that if it is possible to do so, you can go somewhere away from the stress.

If you are living in one room you can get travel eye covers for sleeping on trains etc., and if you have an ipod with relaxing back ground music, or headphones just to block out external awareness that could help. If you need compression have a blanket with some weighted elements, you can buy them for the purpose. Just create an area around yourself in which, as they seem to say all the time these days - you can "chill out".