Published on 12, July, 2020
One of the reasons I’ve ended up alone is that I spent years juggling working and looking after elderly parents. My dad had vascular dementia for several years then within weeks of his passing my mum developed several serious health conditions including Alzheimer’s.
Throughout these years it never occurred to me that I should do anything other than look after them even though it was at huge cost to myself. I know I’d do the same again.
But my brother felt no such duty or obligation and left me to it.
And now I find myself wondering, was that my autistic self allowing my brother to take advantage of me or could it have been inflexible autistic thinking not allowing me to see or take other choices.
Sorry, this is the sort of path my mind takes when spending a day like today alone
You clearly are a lovely person and were there for your parents when they needed you most. You were supportive and caring, you didn't abandon them and you never let them down. They must have been so proud of you. When looking after them you would have had so much to think about and process it's no wonder you couldn't focus on anything else, I've been finding this lately with my own life. When I'm doing something everything else is put on hold and forgotten.
Sending you hugs. You really are a lovely person and you should feel proud for being there when your brother wasn't. You have a clear conscience you did something wonderful which he will never have.
Thank you Luna ️