Published on 12, July, 2020
One of the reasons I’ve ended up alone is that I spent years juggling working and looking after elderly parents. My dad had vascular dementia for several years then within weeks of his passing my mum developed several serious health conditions including Alzheimer’s.
Throughout these years it never occurred to me that I should do anything other than look after them even though it was at huge cost to myself. I know I’d do the same again.
But my brother felt no such duty or obligation and left me to it.
And now I find myself wondering, was that my autistic self allowing my brother to take advantage of me or could it have been inflexible autistic thinking not allowing me to see or take other choices.
Sorry, this is the sort of path my mind takes when spending a day like today alone
I'm not convinced that what you describe has much to do with your autism. There are just people with a heightened sense of duty and selflessness, like yourself, and those who have little sense of duty and who are selfish, like your brother. I suspect that had you behaved like your brother you would now find it difficult to live with your conscience. You are just one of the good guys.