Published on 12, July, 2020
Hi I'm mum and I'm allistic and my son is autistic. We had a Frank and sobering conversation today which shocked and saddened me but I'm glad in a way as I'm glad my son was honest with me..he told me in not so many words he'd rather not be alive due to his Autism as in life the one things he feels that matters the most is the emotional side of things which he can't have ie he was upset that he can't even experience those loving interactions that most neuro typical people take for granted..he basically feels very alone. I feel very sad for him and its frustrating as a mum who loves him very much that there is nothing I can do for him. So this is why I have come on here to ask the question of ..is there happiness to be had in this life when you have Autism? He works hard at fending off the depression that he feels as a result of Autism (ie not clinical depression) he exercises as he says that helps his mental state and he tries to eat right and he has stopped drinking alcohol all together. He doesn't feel enthusiastic about getting outside and doing anything as he says it won't make him any happier if he does interact with people even if he took meds to deal with anxiety etc he doesn't see the point.
I believe it IS possible to live a happy (or reasonably happy) life with ASD, but I think it depends on the individual.
What works for one person, doesn't work for all, but what has been helpful for me is to try to keep my expectations low and focus on the simple things in life. Admittedly, this can be easier said than done when I'm feeling particularly depressed. If something good happens, no matter how simple it may be, I try to look at it as a bonus.
If I spend too much time focussing on the negatives, or things that seem out of reach, it just drags me down. What has helped me is learning to appreciate the simple things in life, and trying not to take those things for granted.
Those are some of my ways of coping also. Right now I'm listening to a very good Cd I have not heard for years. I should be able to take some pleasure in that.