Published on 12, July, 2020
Any one else who was diagnosed later in life feel embarrassed by having an ASD label? When I first found out I guess I was relieved. Then after telling a few acquaintances and getting various responses I decided to stop telling anyone for a while. Where as now it seems that everyone and his (her or whatever) wife are either diagnosed or looking to get diagnosed. So now I feel like if ever I share that I am ASD people will think oh, another one *rolleyes*. I guess part of it is also how people perceive autism too, as an example stimming. I only have very mild stims that I wouldn’t ever do in front of anyone else because of the embarrassment. But I wouldn’t want anyone to think I full on stim as shown in the recent Chris Packham episodes. It’s as if I feel like being autistic makes me less of a person.
This post is purely for discussion and not meant to offend anyone (which seems pretty easy to do these days).
I'm actually less embarrassed about who I am and how I behave now that I've been diagnosed; I used to think I was the only one who did the weird things I do or got upset about things that were no big deal to others. I thought there was something wrong with me and that I was a uniquely flawed and awful person, and that my inability to understand why people thought I was selfish and unreasonable was just another sign that they were correct.
Now, I know that there are millions of people in the world who perceive the world and think about it like I do. I know why I am the way I am and that it's just another way of being a person. Frankly, if I tell someone and they react negatively, tough- I've done my share of managing people's feelings for them and making them feel uncomfortable at the expense of my own wellbeing, I don't need to waste any more time on people who are going to scoff at a legitimate part of my identity.