Published on 12, July, 2020
I have just been diagnosed with Autism with a PDA profile and ADHD at the age of 18.
I have also just moved to London for university and I am struggling with self identity and understanding who i am.
I have been masking my entire life and adapting myself when i am around different people which has really affected my mental health and self esteem and i would like to discover who i am without having to put on an act and to embrace my neurodivergent traits.
Whilst in the assessment for my diagnosis I explained how I act differently and have different personality traits when i am with different people and am in different scenarios. I was asked which version of myself was closest to the true me and it was then that i realised that i have no idea. I am now really struggling with beginning the unmasking process as i have no idea who I am and which traits of mine are what I have put on due to masking and which are truly me.
I am very happy that the university course that i have started is very free and creative and will allow me to unmask without feeling judged as there are many people who are neurodivergent within this career sector and course.
Does anyone have any tips on how to begin the unmasking process and to discover my true personality as i am feeling very lost and unsure of what my next steps are.
Thank you for reading
Spending time alone to understand what you are actually like for yourself has been useful for me. Then it is simply about understanding that this person is fine in whatever format you discover yourself to be, it is fine. Better than fine, you are perfect the way you are.
You simply need to then be that person with others. I know that is very hard. Very very hard. But that is the hurdle you must overcome.
Anyone who doesn't connect with this person or puts you down in anyway isn't worthy of your time so move along.
It's a long road, but the only journey available. Anything else is just a new form of masking
Good luck, we are here for you Go get em!
I think a good starting point would be thinking about the things which make you the happiest. The things that don't drain your energy.
I'm in the same boat as you though.